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Monday 14 January 2013

Coronation Street Weekly Update, January 14 2013

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Greetings and welcome to the Coronation Street Weekly Update. Find out more about the Coronation Street Weekly Updates and why they've been written for th'internet since 1995 at

Put the kettle on and get the biscuit’s out, the posh ones, because all is well with the world.  Yes, Hayley’s back from the US of A after looking after Roy’s mum in Palm Springs. Hayley waved at no-one in particular in the caf√© as she returned and I don’t know about you, but we waved right back at her. So it’s a complete and utter shame that the day after she returned after a few months away, ITV announce Hayley Cropper is to leave Coronation Street after 15 years.  I know, how sad. How very, very sad.  So let’s enjoy her while we can now that she’s back as she takes Roy to task when he pulls summat in his back lifting summat heavy in the caff. Mary’s drafted in to help as Fiz is up to her neck in dirty pans, Ken’s busy with the crossword, well that 19 down’s a tricky one to solve, and Anna’s away. Roy doesn’t want Mary back to help him out, and who can blame him after she almost lost him his license? But circumstances dictate that Mary helps out and so Mary does while Roy grins and bears it as best as he can but he’s very not best pleased.

Now then, the Street’s always been good on feckless fellas and they don’t come much more feckless than Karl. He’s not in love with Sunita, we all know he never was, but Sunita thought she was on to something romantic and lovely when she had her head turned by Karl.  And we all knew that Karl took up with Sunita because he thought he was on to something good, cheap and easy, a roof over his head until he could get back with St Ella.  Bring back Sunita’s aunties! They’d soon sort him out.  He gets drunk at Asha and Aadi’s birthday party this week, embarrasses himself and makes Sunita look even more stupid than he is, which takes some doing,  all the while trying to convince Our Lady of the Back Room to allow him to re-enter her shrine.

Gail had some good lines this week, egged on by Lewis, as she put her two-pennorth in to stir things up between Nick and Leanne who announce their wedding, again. “It’s too soon, it’s too stupid and it’s a complete farce!” she tells Nick and Leanne but they get wed anyway, with Gail staying away on Lewis’ advice.  Yes, Lewis is pulling Gail’s strings and making her do a merry dance to alienate her family and those around her while Nick takes his nuts out of Gail’s tabard pocket and marries Leanne, again, who becomes Mrs Leanne Battersby-Tilsley-Battersby-Barlow-Battersby-Tilsley and I’m sure you’ll correct me if I’m wrong. Let’s call her Lebatilsby for short.

But while Nick looks happy enough as he and Lebatilsby jet off to Paris on ze unnymoon (I knew my French CSE grade 1  would come in handy one day) he’s hiding torment and torture just underneath his tie and tux. Yes,  sister-in-law Kylie is pregnant with child and it could be Nick’s. It could also be David but the poor baby’s scupperered any which way, because whoever the dad is, Gail is the grandma and that does not bode well for any little bairn.  Kylie decides to have an abortion but doesn’t tell David that she’s up the stick, in the club, has a bun in the oven, etc. She does tell motor-mouth Eva who tells David who races to the abortion clinic and manages to force Kylie to talk to him. She’s in tears, David’s in bits and he tells her if she doesn’t have what he thinks is his baby then it’s over between them. Oh ‘eck.
And finally over at Underworld, underhand shenanigans continue as Rob undercuts his sister and Carla ends up having to offload a knicker order that Rob has gone and nicked. The only way Carla can get rid of the stock is to sell her pants cheap on the market to Nobby and Nolene. Now there’s a comic couple we just have to meet.

And that's just about that for this week. Remember, you can sign up to get these Corrie weekly updates by email at

This week's writers were Debbie Oates, Simon Crowther, Susan Oudot  Find out all about the Coronation Street writing team at

Glenda Young
Blogging away merrily at

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1 comment:

Family Seat said...

Those big pants look comfy.


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