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Monday 14 January 2013

Oh for goodness sake, Coronation Street!

I'm in whingey, whiney mode again, and I make no apologies for this. I feel like I'm performing a public service! What is going on with Coronation Street? It's beginning to drive me bonkers.

Is there something in the water in Weatherfield? Less that two weeks ago Fiz-Bomb Stape was nearly gassed to death in her very own front parlour and what now? Back, full of life, slopping out cold beans and limp toast to Jason "I've got my hands on Stella's pumps" Grimshaw. Not in the real world.

And as for Jason and St Ella, the Cougar of the parish. What are the Coronation Street production team trying to do to me? Do they really not like me at all? Do they know I need to diet after Christmas so they've produced this coupling to put me off my Scotch pies and Tunnocks Teacakes? Perhaps Jason will be the dumper this time instead of the dumped and surprise us all?

The Roy and Mary thing? Not again! Now, I really like Roy and Mary is ok in small doses, but I feel this has been done to death already. Now we know Hayley is leaving I get nervous every time I see Mary circling Roy like a barmy piranha. Please do not put them together. I worry a future plot line will see Roy taped up and held prisoner in that motorhome.

Leanne and Nick. Leanne and Peter. Carla and Peter. Leanne and Nick again. How many more permutations of this can we cope with? I am waiting for the writers to have them all go gay. We are getting to the point where this story is not only scraping the bottom of the barrel, it's underneath it. I'm surprised we've not had Leanne having an affair with Carla and Peter shacking up with Nick. Give it time...

How many times have we seen the classic plot device of a one night stand leading to a pregnancy? Here we go again, this time with David and Kylie. And how many times have we had a desperate dash to an abortion clinic to stop it taking place? Such issues are not to be taken lightly but it feels like it's storylining by numbers to add to the "explosive" drama. 

And three special requests: No more boring faktry stories with Apprentice rejects Michelle and Rob. Before much longer please let Norris be nice, not this nasty, cantankerous old sourpuss he's become. And  finally...enough with all the shouting! Corrie never used to be this way! Aggression all over the place! It's unnecessary, adds nothing and reminds me of a lesser soap opera on the other side...

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Anonymous said...

Loving the Fiz pic at the top of this piece lol. I agree with everything you've said. I'm wondering if all the Storyliners are soooo young they think its groundbreaking stuff I.e. all new to them. It's pathetic . No imagination and little life experience

Anonymous said...

You forgot to mention, Michelle and Nick, then she cheats with Peter and Carla humps,oops, meant jumps Steve. Hey I could be a Corrie writer. You forgot Ryan, turning Sophie and then Jason deciding to steal her. Lots of stories and you forgot Eva, she could end up with Paul or Des. There is so many tales to be told, and it would shake the street up and take our minds off Kirsty. That story line needed to be dealt with but it has gotten a little unreal for me, Tyrone can't go to a lawyer and ask about his rights, he's not that stunned.

Anonymous said...

And, for heaven's sake, it hasn't even been one month since Kylie and Nick did the deed -- how does she know she's pregnant already????

Anonymous said...

But these storylines are coming from the brilliant mind of Phil "don't bother me with reality" Collinson.
Surely there must have been somebody that he answered to and that person obviously wasn't doing their job or he wouldn't have been able to push these crap storylines on us.
They just didn't promote him soon enough to save the Street.

Humpty Dumpty said...

I really am beginning to think the directors have come from panto. Kylie and Nick talking, not even stage whispering, about her pregnancy with nobody apparently noticing, Anna and Stella both listening agog to private conversations - all they need to do is cup an ear and say: 'Hark,I hear the sound of Bow Bells'. Where is the subtlety, these days?

Anonymous said...

I gave up on the Corrie merry-go-round a long time ago I was a die hard fan for 10 years but the stories started repeating themselves over and over and over again. I guess the producers would assume the viewers wouldn't notice or, they really don't give a toss.

Jen P said...

Totally agree about the Carla, Peter, Leanne, Nick thing. If Carla and Nick ever got together, Peter would probably murder Nick!
On a serious note, I prefer Carla and Peter as a couple but they are hardly in any scenes together anymore and the material the actors are getting is dreadful. The love square is so tedious and a load of crap.

I would love to see Peter and Carla in a good storyline.

David said...

You're so right about Norris. It's like the writers have pigeonholed him as a gossip so that's all ever does. But he never used to be so shameless about it. The writers got it wrong last year when Emily put Tracy up and we were meant to think Norris was the bad guy for wanting a lock on his door - I was cheering for him! Sadly most of the characters have gone wrong in some way in the last few years, but I blame it on the rate at which the writers are expected to churn out scripts, rather than their ability.

Frosty the Snowman said...

Frosty agrees wholeheartedly with this blog and the picutre of Fizug is enough to put you off your burnt toast. How annoying is this character. However, another thing that really gets Frosty goat is the way that when someone has upset someone else they feel they can throw a drink all over them. I have never seen this done once in the real world and if they did someone could expect a serious punch for doing so, but Corrie seem to think its OK to do this if you are displeased with someone.

vicky said...

That comment about whether they'll all "go gay" reminds me... is it me or do Carla and Michelle have ten times the chemistry that Carla and Peter do?

I understand that they've committed to this Carla/Peter/Leanne/Nick storyline now and they have to see it through, but it still stretches credibility that Nick would marry Leanne after everything that happened.

And I really dislike the way soaps handle abortion storylines. I can't remember the last time a woman was allowed to make up her own mind up regarding abortion in a soap opera (not without adverse consequences anyway). Not every abortion has to be a question of "what does the lover want?" or "what does the husband want?" It would be nice if women got to make up their own minds occasionally.


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