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Tuesday 26 February 2013

Coronation Street Weekly Update - living life in the bus lane

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Greetings and welcome to the Coronation Street Weekly Update.  Find out more about the Coronation Street Weekly Updates and why they've been written for th'internet since 1995 at

Gail’s got a face like a smacked baby’s bottom this week when she’s told by Nick that he could be Kylie’s baby’s dad. Mind you, so could David but Gail purses her lips, tuts and harangues poor Kylie when she returns from hospital with a ruptured spleen after falling off a table, drunk, in the Rovers Return. I love soap, me, everything happens so quick. David is none the wiser about being the dad or not, he just thinks Gail’s in a bad mood with Kylie and tells Gail he won’t stand for her shouting the odds at his poorly wife.  And when Gail refuses to stop kicking off at Kylie, David kicks Gail out of the house. She mopes and moans on Maxine’s bench until Sally walks by, remembers they once had a friendship in the ‘80s and takes Gail in for white wine, dinner, shared gossip and a lady hug.

Meanwhile in the Rovers, Gloria’s turned into a nasty piece of work. She tuts when Sunita walks in: “She’s showing everything she’s got – and more if she had it!” and comes out with a wonderful line to Stella who complains that Gloria’s taking new fella, the minted millionaire Eric, for a ride. “Some of us live life in the fast lane, whereas you prefer life in the bus lane, don’t you, Stella love?”  While Gloria plans how best and how quick to spend Eric’s cash, he’s offering to take Eva around the world on a cruise. “I love cruising, me,” confides Sylvia to him in the pub. “Word of advice… take baggy slacks”.  But her words fall on deaf ears, and dead ears, as Eric pops his clogs in the bar. Gloria will miss the money, Eva will miss her chance to escape Weatherfield. But will anyone miss Eric? It’s hard to say.

Elsewhere, Lloyd tries and fails to build up the courage to tell Mandy that Flash the tortoise is dead. They pronounce it tor-toyse in the north-west but I always thought that was a posh way of saying it. We pronounce it tor-tuss in the north-east which is the turtelly right way of course.  When Lloyd does break the news, Mandy’s shell-shocked.

And that's just about that for this week. Remember, you can sign up to get these Corrie weekly updates by email at

This week's writers were Julie Jones, Ellen Taylor, John Kerr and Jonathan Harvey.  Find out all about the Coronation Street writing team at

Glenda Young
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ChiaGwen said...

LOL Mandy's shell-shocked! Good one. This has to be the most useless annoying storyline (aside from the Mark/Marcia fiasco)and we are to believe that Mandy is beside herself, upon hearing of Flash's demise, sobbing into Lloyds lapels. She kept the turtle hidden in a decrepit shoe box - when did she ever see him, when she peeked in to see if he was alive? Besides I'm near to screaming after hearing TOR-TOYSE once too often!

Billy Niblick said...

Boy, is Lloyd for the high jump when the truth about Flash's demise comes out, as it surely will.

Anonymous said...

I swear, if Gail could suck her lips in anymore, she could kiss her own tonsils. What a sour-puss!
However, I do like this side of her far better than the twit they were having her portray with her head down Nick's loo popping in to the bar to spout moronic one-liners every now and then.
The tortoise thing is getting beyond boring. Mandy and Lloyd just ain't jivin'...IMO anyway.

Janice said...

I have been watching Corrie on internet and it is so easy to skip scenes with Lloyd/Mandy/Steve in them.

Anonymous said...

She kept flash in the shoebox because he was in hibernation!!

I swear some of you people only skip through the program so you can look for things to moan about.


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