Sarah thinks Bethany has a crush on a member of a band that she has bought concert/gig tickets for. Faye thinks she fancies obnoxious Seb. Gary thinks it's a different older man that she likes.
After Sarah cries off the concert as Harry is ill, and encouraged by Gary's supportive remarks ("I need you", "They'd be lucky to get a girl like you"), Bethany decides to stage a seduction with her LBD and some Dutch courage. She tells Gary that she and Sarah are more like sisters than mother and daughter, whereas in reality, it's Faye who is more of a stroppy sibling to her. Bethany sees Faye as a kid and herself as a grown up, "She's just at that age," she says of Faye, claiming that she, herself, is "way more mature." But it's not Gary or Sarah who finds Bethany draped over Gary's bed but Faye, who announces that it's "well slutty".
Like a mini-Phelan, Faye blackmails Bethany (make-up, new top, vodka) for her silence, which kind of works until Faye is found drunk in the hotel lobby and is returned in disgrace to Gary and the newly arrived Sarah, at which point Bethany fesses up to giving her the booze. Bethany hasn't succeeded in breaking up Sarah and Gary with her kittenish charms, but has driven a wedge between them as she admits that Gary let her have some booze (I'd be less worried about a 16 year old having a glass of wine than the prices of the minibar!) and he, to her consternation, tells her to "grow up." Poor Bethany, not a girl, not yet a woman.
Someone whose secret is definitely out is Mary when Gemma, dressed in her Prima Doner/Scooch in 2007 uniform, makes a video asking for help finding Mary's long lost son, and asks everyone under the age of 35 to share or RT it. It takes Kirk to tell her she's done the wrong thing, although by this point, Mary has seen the vid and blamed Norris for gossiping, telling him "Don't talk to me ever, ever again!" Poor Nozzatron!
Another one with a secret is Andy, who is instructed by Phelan to come visit him in hospital, where he issues a decree that Andy must get him some dough. He is outraged by Phelan's suggestion that he get money from the Bistro ("I'm not stealing from the till!"), conveniently forgetting the time he pretended to have been mugged with the day's takings to keep Gavin off his back. Steph has ordered too many iPads and so Andy breaks into the Bistro to nick them. I'm not sure Andy has the patter to become a "fell off the back of a lorry" salesman. I'm also unsure as to why Andy just doesn't deny everything. Is there still CCTV at the yard?
For the record I'm going to miss Steph and Andy, the former's perky charm and the latter's chocolate drop eyes. I feel that more could have been done with the characters; their only good storyline was the original one when Gandy arrived. Fare thee well then, Corrie's cutest couple.
Maria keeps Lian off school so they can stay home and bake reindeer biscuits, although her son wants to go to the school party. Eventually, Kirk takes him, and then for his first kebab, whilst Maria goes to the pub and gets into the Christmas spirit, or wine. Having previously chucked Adam out of her flat for suggesting that he and she get jiggy with it whilst Liam watches Peppa Pig, Maria latches onto him when Aidan comes into the Rovers and they go into town to carry on boozing, not before Maria has tried to persuade Aidan to come home with her, however.
By the by, it's a good job that Michelle doesn't criticise all her customers for drinking alone, otherwise the Rover's profits wouldn't be enough to cover her eyeliner bill.
And finally, David returns to the scene of the crime to find Shona, the wallet thief, who denies anything dodgy took place, but later retrieves the wallet and the photo of Kylie from the bins. Will Christmas come early with the return of the photo? I'm not sure if Shona is being set up as new love interest for David (she's certainly his type: dark, skinny, feisty), but it seems that she's being introduced in the same way Tina and then Kylie were.
This is my last review of the year as I'll be downing my own weight in eggnog and Quality Street on Boxing Day. Merry Christmas, everyone!
Rachel Stevenson - on twitter.

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