Coronation Street Blog: Five Things We Learned In Corrie This Week

Saturday, 9 December 2017

Five Things We Learned In Corrie This Week

The Platt family uniform is slowly being rolled out. Black leather jacket, black top - basically lower rung members of the T-Birds in a community theatre production of Grease. Audrey hasn't yet adopted the look, but I'm sure she's just having the leather jacket taken in so she's more Sexy Sandy than Doody.

Male grooming is very important. Tim might seem like an unthinking barbarian, but he actually takes great pride in his appearance. Why else would he ask his step-daughter to wax his eyebrows in the cab office? This is the 21st century, and even an unreconstructed County fan needs to present his best look.

Norris is the Batman the world needs right now. With Justice League fizzling at the box office, it looks like Ben Affleck will be hanging up the cape and cowl. And who better to replace him as Batman than Norris Cole? Admittedly the action sequences will have to be a little slower to accommodate a Dark Knight in his seventies - perhaps they could pause so he could have a nice sit down - and the batsuit will have to be modified to incorporate a cardigan. I'd much rather see Norris boring the Riddler into submission with talk of his corns than another moody superhero flick filmed through a black sheet.

Jenny Bradley and the Emanuels have a past. The fragrant Mrs Connor apparently wrote a fan letter to the designers of Princess Di's wedding dress, but things "turned nasty". It's easily done; one minute you're fangirling and complimenting their puffball sleeves, the next you're paying the extra postage so your voodoo doll with a crudely decapitated head gets priority delivery. I can empathise; I had a similar experience with Charlie from Casualty, and now they won't take my electronic tag off until the New Year.

Michelle has no sense of humour. Apparently Tracy's gift of a phallic cactus wasn't funny. Actually, Michelle, I think you'll find it was very funny indeed.