Gritty sagas by Corrie blog editor Glenda Young, published by Headline. Click pic below!

Sunday, 20 May 2018

Five Things We Learned In Corrie This Week

The solicitor's office could do with a lick of paint. How long has Adam been running his law firm from that hole on Victoria Street?  It must be nearly a year, and yet he still hasn't taken down the name plate of the previous occupant.  That whole office is sloppy - grimy walls, chipped woodwork, and the FAWN campaign posters turning yellow in the corner.  You can't tell me Adam's short of a few bob - there's been a steady parade of clients through that door over the past week, wanting advice on everything from divorces to criminal law, because apparently they cover all legal issues.  I'm sure Rosie would love the opportunity to do a bit of interior decorating, though you'd need to keep an eye on her in case she breaks out the glitter and the Hello Kitty pink.  No-one wants to discuss their deceased love one's will against a backdrop of nauseating neons.  Come on Adam - it wouldn't take you and Imran more than a weekend with a sponge roller.

Good things come in threes.  Can you just go to an old people's home and claim an old lady?  Not a relative, not a friend, just some old woman you fancy taking home to your poky flat where she won't even have her own space.  Shouldn't Social Services get involved or are they just happy there's a room going spare?  Let's be honest, it was all just an excuse for Wednesday's episodes, where Flora, Doris and Jonny Briggs' Mam knocked back the milk stout and talked about Pulp Fiction's gimp.  Three old biddies complaining in the corner of the Rovers?  That's meat and drink to the Corrie writers.  On top of all that, Flora can't stand Sinead and wants to stop her from moving in with Daniel; that's the kind of behaviour that can very easily win my heart.

Sophie is not pleased with Federation incursions into the Neutral Zone.  We all have our own personal fashion muses.  Carla dresses like a model faking tears at the funeral of her elderly billionaire husband; Rita is all faux fur and big hair, like a particularly glamorous Womble; Gemma goes to George at Asda, rolls around in the kids department and wears whatever sticks.  Sophie, meanwhile, has turned to Subcommander Taris of the Romulan Empire as her inspiration. 

The fringe!  The padded shoulders!  The furrowed brow!  That rapey bloke in the pub was lucky Sophie didn't break out her disruptor; he'd have been a tiny pile of dust under the snooker table before he could finish his gross leching.

It's hard to say goodbye if you won't leave.  Gail's attempts to evict the emotionally distraught Emma fell on deaf ears.  "I just can't stop loving him," she wailed about David, "even though he cheated on me and possibly gave me a sexually transmitted disease."  In the face of such blithe indifference to a gentle hint, Gail simply backed away.  She's rightly realised that this is all David's fault so she may as well leave him to sort out his own mess, and in the meantime, the rent will come in handy.  I hope Emma continues to completely miss all social cues, and David and Shona find themselves in a throuple whether they like it or not.

Michelle is going to miss Ali when his placement ends. No, she definitely is.  She might have ignored him for ten years but that doesn't mean she doesn't care.  She won't forget him the minute he walks out the door, because she definitely loves... what was it again?  Aaron?  Andrew?

If you're a man in crisis who needs to talk to someone, phone Summer's Speak and Save hotline.  If you're a man in heat who wants to share his nudes, my Twitter handle is @merseytart.  

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coconno196 said...

As I recall, it was Ali who wanted nothing to do with Michelle when the baby swap was discovered. It pains me to say it, but Michelle was blameless. It was a hospital error and as soon as she found out she did her best to forge a relationship with him.

Humpty Dumpty said...

Flora's gang are a good laugh but perhaps she's on the Street for a particular reason. My money's on Flora doing away with Phelan to avenge her Howard(?)'s death. I'm not sure if Flora knows that Vinny's died but she'll overhear people talking about Phelan and fully realise what happened. A swift end to Phelan on his return with or without Flora. In any case, she wouldn't get arrested on the ground of being unfit to stand trial.

Flo said...

Humpty, you gave me a thought--perhaps Flora's flighty behavior is all an act? And maybe she is going to be who does Phelan in. Reason I say that is I had an aunt who "forgot" a lot of things in order to hide her money from another family member. She knew where it all was but wanted everyone to think she wasn't all there. She admitted it after the family member in question passed away!

I'm glad you mentioned that horrid coat of Sophie's. It looks as though she was shopping at the local charity shop. Hey, the 80's wants it's coat back!


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