Coronation Street double episode review, Monday 8 July

It’s breakfast time, as our Street starts off, which is the case on most Mondays, and a doleful Gail appears at David and Kylie’s. She is profoundly shaken by David’s disgraceful behaviour towards her – threats, abuse and the really offensive throwing of peanuts. This peanut throwing was alarmingly disrespectful and the scene last week worked really well.

But, back to tonight. At least David does admit that he was out of order, but there is a deliberate sense of David being anything but genuine. Jack P Shepherd, the actor who plays David, does malevolence brilliantly. His words, that he’s feeling a bit stressed are woefully inadequate as to why he behaves as he does. Kylie tells him, ‘You’d better sort it and quick.’

Sean’s Mothercare dream relieves the tension briefly. He and Harry Styles, from One Direction, are in Mothercare choosing a pram. Harry is pregnant with Sean’s baby and they can’t agree over their pram choices so Harry becomes hysterical. Eileen, please, just go to the counsellor – it might well help you. She does and it does, as we see later. After recounting the dream, Paul returns home and asks Sean why he isn’t at work. Very wittily Sean replies, ‘I hear the cry of unstitched gussets calling my name.’

Despite Rob’s absence the factory seems to be doing very nicely so Carla and Michelle head off on a shopping trip with a drink at the end of it. And they just about manage on the cobbles in those heels. No wonder they were holding on to each other. Just one false note here – is Carla really worrying about Peter’s tea? Hard to believe she’s the kind of woman who would be troubled by Peter’s lack of nourishment, much more likely to say, ‘Sod ‘im!’ So, finally sisters were doing it for themselves and Peter didn’t die of starvation. Impossible tonight to leave the factory completely without mentioning Kirk’s request for petty cash to buy toilet roll or the ladies’ loo. His questioning of his bosses’ preference for quilted with flowers or just cheap stuff was glorious.

Young love is not running smoothly for Sinead, Chesney, Katy or Ryan. Wise for her age, Sinead tells Chesney she doesn’t want to waste her time but it seems that Katy is wasting her time. She knows it too. Chesney is not playing around though when it comes to talking to Ryan. Chesney asks how Joseph went on at the doctor’s and Ryan replies, ‘He seems good mate, no problems.’ Chesney replies, ‘First of all, I’m not your mate and second I wasn’t asking you.’ Chesney is right of course, Ryan is only pretending to care for Joseph, and in fact all he cares about is himself.

David’s malevolence and plotting is working to excellent effect. He phones the police to alert them to Student Night at the Bistro, he skilfully, even masterly plays Leanne and Nick, one off the other. He appears so measured, so on the side of whoever he’s talking to at any one time.

I know not everyone is a fan of Mary, but look how well she has helped Dev and the children; nothing short of excellent. And, no one can say she’s not willing to give things a go, hence her arrival at student night in The Bistro. Kylie obviously thinks Mary won’t be staying but she is mistaken. Mary is a self-confessed student of life. (And that despite her mother saying that she had failed the entrance exam to life. What sort of a mother was she?). Mary tells Gail that the night is young, ‘even if some of us aren’t.’ Great this was as Mary was patting Gail’s hand as she said this, the strong implication being that she, Mary, did not include herself in those who are no longer young. ‘Your daughter-in-law might be slightly coarse and have dubious dress sense, but she makes a fantastic pink lady.’ She goes on, Mary at her best and tells Gail that despite her many romantic disasters, she’s like a boxer, bloodied and bruised, but never gives up.

The journalist was a good inclusion. When asked if she’d like a small, medium or large drink, she simply replies, ‘Massive.’  She’s delighted now that she’s got this story and will be able to tell her sleazy boss about her scoop.

The whole Faye/Tim/Anna/Owen plot line confuses me. What exactly has Tim done that is so wrong? So tonight he laughed about Anna reading Faye a story, even though she’s eleven. Well, it would have been better if he hadn’t laughed, but it doesn’t make him a demon. Yes, Anna makes a valid defence, but Tim himself may never have had anyone read to him either. True, he’s not going to win dad of the year, but he’s not all bad. At least Sally rather likes him. A budding romance here? Well at least he tells her that a conservatory is inanimate and can’t be attention-seeking.

Oh and a note to Mr Gove from Paul. Furious that he has had to deal with a hoaxer, he thinks all children should learn the story of The Boy Who Cried Wolf. No doubt it will be on the National Curriculum already.

David’s revenge or Lewis’ revenge? Which is the more successful? We don’t know yet but the big money’s on David.