The saga of Mavis's budgie entered what felt like its eighth millennium as Mrs Wilton fretted about depriving Mrs Featherstone of a bird that was rightly hers. Derek confessed to his dual bird subterfuge and she finally accepted that Boris slash Harry was hers. I really, really don't care. In other plots that never seem to end Alf went to the TV shop to collect a new portable. He demanded an apology from Jim, and once again Jim told him to stuff it; when his boss insisted, Jim broke another telly and resigned. This forced Liz to go out in search of work, and she wangled a job as a barmaid at the Rovers, despite having no experience. It was a momentous moment in the history of the show as she pulled her first pint, though it was laced with unintentional comedy for those of us watching in 2018 as Alec asked her to wear lower-cut tops behind the bar and she said no. Yes, Liz McDonald insisted on wearing more clothing! Deirdre and Dave finally broke up as she refused to move in with him ("I'll never get married again," she proclaimed, once more giving the 21st century viewer a giggle), while Mike was throwing his weight around at Ingram's and drawing Jackie under his spell.
TUESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 19th and 21st September 1990
Ding-ding, seconds out! It was Alf v Jim in a full on scrap in the back yard. The only damage ended up being to the motorbike, but Liz decided enough was enough, and lied to both men that the other had apologised. Ivy went to the medium, but wasn't picked for
WEDNESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 24th and 26th September 1990
A theme of today's show was "men can't take no for an answer". Jackie had decided to sell the factory, so Mike smarmed around her to convince her that was a bad idea, having a meal at her house and playing the confidante. Ken on the other hand took Deirdre's divorce proceedings as a sign that what she really needed was marriage guidance. He turned up at number 1 with a load of pamphlets and left with a flea in his ear. She offered to drop the divorce proceedings if Ken would move out of the Street. Jim was ignoring Liz, buying up a dodgy old bike to fix it up and make a bomb selling it on even though she wanted him to get a proper job. In news from the realm of the dead, Ivy got a warning that a "Martin" was going to be in a car crash; she fled the meeting, full of worry, and rushed off to tell Gail. "I'm not one for causing trouble," said the Human Stomach Ulcer as she dropped the news that a psychic predicted the father of Gail's child was probably going to die. Don and Martin were both predictably furious. He went in the Rovers and had a go at her, but Bet became upset when she heard the full message involved a "Martin" and a "hospital" and an "Elizabeth"...
THURSDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 28th and 1st October 1990
Prompted by the psychic message, Bet confessed to Alec about Martin: the son she put up for adoption when she was 16, who then died in a car crash. He was of course sympathetic but had a quiet word with Don about Ivy spreading her nonsense and getting Bet upset. She decided that this proved the message from the dead was real and tried to persuade Bet to come to a spiritualist meeting with her. She politely declined, so Ivy laid a load of guilt on her about Martin wanting to send a message through and Bet ignoring it, because she's a horrible person. She then finished the episode by saying she could hear the spirits herself. Ken tried to chat to Deirdre, thinking they were back on track, but she told him she was only dropping the divorce while it could be difficult; after two years of separation she was going to get a quickie. Ken actually decided to keep his word and gave his notice at the flat and applied for a job in Kent. Jim's bike spare business seemed to be taking off, with a young John Thomson dressed as an X-Wing pilot turning up in search of spares, so he supplemented his stock with a rusty truck and some mopeds. Mike and Jackie spent more time together, and he subtly hinted that his relationship with Alma wasn't that permanent, just in case that was of interest to her (FYI, in the show's timeline, Peter Ingram died literally six weeks ago). He also arranged for a mate of his to pose as a buyer to convince Jackie the factory wasn't worth as much as she thought.
FRIDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 3rd and 5th October 1990
Mike and Ralph, Jackie's right hand man, had a council of war to discuss her plans for the factory. They agreed she'd be terrible, but when she announced that she wanted to run the business herself, Mike stabbed Ralph in the back and took her side. Ralph left the sinking ship, telling Jackie that if she was really wise she'd dump Baldwin because he was poison. Percy Sugden ran round the street, getting people to agree with him that Jim's motorbike scheme was going to ruin the neighbourhood, then grassed them all up. Jim ended up rowing with Mavis in the Kabin and had to buy them drinks to apologise. Psychic Ivy upset Emily by telling her she had a message from Ernie for her in the middle of the Rovers. Emily told her to get lost - in a very polite Emily Bishop way of course - but it still meant Mrs Brennan had made a holy show of herself in public. Audrey and Alma had a giggle about it in the shop, and Don overheard, but when he tried to tell Ivy she was a laughing stock she said she was giving up the spiritualism anyway. Not because she'd seen sense, but because Bert Tilsley had come to her from beyond the veil and told her him and Brian were doing fine in the afterlife. Weirdly, it'll be another four years before she has a breakdown and runs off to a religious retreat. It's hard to imagine she can get any nuttier.
The author is also blessed with second sight and can see into the future. That Don Brennan's going to come to a nasty end in a car crash, Alma's going to get cancer, and Jim McDonald's going to pretend his girlfriend is his dead daughter. If you want any further info contact me on Twitter @merseytart with your credit card number.
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