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Saturday 22 December 2012

Your ideal Coronation Street episode

Now it might just be the very strong medication I am currently taking or the side-effects of NHS catering, but I did dream/hallucinate about being in charge of Coronation Street the other night. 

As hallucinations go, it wasn't actually a bad one, although it was disappointingly clean. Anyway, I did dream I was in the Corrie hot seat, so in the spirit of Christmas, I thought I would share my experience. 

Or I would if I could actually remember what happened. Knowing me it would probably involve Rita, Audrey and a bottle of gin. 

However all this drug-fuelled thinking did make me ponder what it would be like to be in charge of producing an episode of Coronation Street. We all have our say on what we love/like/dislike/hate about Corrie, but it is easy to do so without the pressure of being in any way responsible. So I thought, what would I do if I was given control of an actual episode? 

Well, it would definitely revolve around the Street's more established, long-serving characters. I think it would also focus on some of Corrie's classic, strong, women.  They have always been the backbone of the show, and rightly so. There would also be frequent references to Corrie's golden past. And there would be no high drama, no violence, no deaths, no hysteria. 

With me so far? 

My idea would be very simple. I'd love some of the more mature Corrie ladies to sit round sharing a few drinks and remembering old times. I think Rita, Emily, Audrey, Gail, Deirdre and Sally would feature. I would want it to be full of comedy but also with a tinge of classic Corrie sadness and pathos. I think it was Betty Driver who said Corrie missed the old scenes where a few characters would stand around the Rovers bar discussing nothing in particular. These scenes may not have advanced the current plots a great deal, however they were full of Corrie magic and always entertaining. The modern Street sometimes moves too quickly for my liking. Anyway that would be my suggestion for a cracking, stand-alone episode.

So if you were in the director's chair at Coronation Street and found yourself in charge of an episode what would you do? Which characters would you want to use? What would the story be? Only a bit of fun, but I'd love to hear your ideas. 

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Anonymous said...

I would like to see Corrie less's becoming more Eastenders-trying to cater to younger audiences IMO. I find that strong willed women in this show are usually relegated to a pregnancy somewhere in the mix..either being pressured to have a baby by their current partner, or having one without any thought to how they're going to afford it. I really miss Betty..she was one of a kind. And Blanche...boy, could she deliver a line..always had me laughing.
I really hope the new producer brings Carla back as she was, not as she is now because she's just a shadow of her former self.

Frosty the Snowman said...

I would like Gloria to open up a bar in Spain and take Stella with her. Michelle to go back to Ireland. Dev to leave to move elsewhere and another ethnic family move into the Corner shop. I would like more character driven stories and less sensationalsm. The ladies not dropping their knickers so quickly. I would also like what happens to be a surprise and not know plots leaked months in advance Oh and STOP this I am leaving Weatherfield nonsense when character are not going anywhere and we know it. Its silly.

Glenda Young said...

Brilliant idea. I had a dream the other night that Carla Connor turned out to be Brian Packham's mother and the corrie press team swore me to secrecy so I was bursting with this spoiler but couldn't blog about it. Less cheese before bedtime, perhaps? Or maybe more!

Carry On Blogging! said...

I think you need to eat more cheese if you're having dreams like that!!

Anonymous said...

Flaming Nora,MORE cheese, and a wee drop of something as well!

Janice said...

In Fridays episode Kirsty said to Tyrone "I'm a terrible person. I hate myself." She then proceeds to the canal and plops herself down amid the turkeys. Her dead body is discovered by Shelley who returns with her son by Charlie Stubbs, who should be about five by now but in Corrie years that is old enough to exact revenge on Tracy, who is found suffocated, apparently smothered by her own smugness. Then we turn to the facktry where Eva is at her sewing maching with her enormous boobs jutting in the way. They get caught in the sewing machine, along with the knock-off knickers. Hence she ends her life with her knickers in a permanent twist and her tits in a knot. That would be my dream Corrie episode.

Anonymous said...

My dream episode..Steve MacDonald gurns so many times in one episode, his face stays like that permanently and he resembles the Joker (as per Jack Nicholson)
He then goes mad..throttles Tracy (and this time she's really gone) and ends up in a hospital for the criminally insane forever..never to been seen or gurned from again.
He can take Ken out too, for all it's worth.

Anonymous said...

I'd love to see those women playing poker or some card games like Desperate Housewives.. Something regular and get together. Over the time, I reckon they should mention the past characters in passing. I'd have a creche for all the babies, Gail could be in charge for that. Sally definitely could be in charge for a clothes shop or something in butcher old space. The corner shop undergo a new renovation when Julie takes over. The factory becomes something new like a community hall or something.

Humpty Dumpty said...

Now this may have been done as a spin-off so apologies in advance.

The episode is a Corrie Christmas Carol where Mike Baldwin appears as a ghost warning Ken that he is the only one who can save Coronation Street. Three spirits will visit him - the spirits of Corrie past, present and future. The unfortunate present we know about but we see through Ken's eyes the happy days of Corrie past complete with monochrome cats on rooftops. Ken begs to stay there but he is forced to watch Corrie yet-to-come. It's a street filled with people who strangely look like Steve McDonald. Then a ferocious old hag, foaming at the mouth, appears at the door of no 1 and, on closer inspection, proves to be Tracy Barlow. She yells at the McDonald look-alikes and we learn that she has never stopped having Steve's children. Ken screams in terror at this apparition and realises just why he is the only one who can save the Street. He takes one of Deirdre's heavier ceramics pots and searches for Tracy. Well, you can guess the rest.

Glenda Young said...

I'd love the women to go on holiday together, doesnt' need to be Spain again, could be Blackpool or Scarborough or somewhere. Deirdre, Sally, Gail, with Carla turning up drunk looking to be part of the girls' gang and no one wanting her there.

Carry On Blogging! said...

I'm not that keen on Corrie when they take characters away from the street, it always falls a bit flat for me. Having another go at the lovely Carla I see!! I'm sure Deirdre would welcome her with open arms if she turned up with a few bottles of red ;)

Anonymous said...

Tracey chokes to death on a sprout and fat Mandy has a massive coronary, leaving Lloyd and Steve to move in together and raise Amy - proving that two men can make good parents, gay or straight. Kirsty tops herself, Fiz and Ty get married and Sophie finally decides to get a life and disappears off to uni...forever.


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