Well, Graeme, I can't believe you actually went through with it. I was sure that you would abscond through the Registry Office toilet window. You certainly did seem to be unsure throughout the whole thing, although - as in several recent weddings in the street - we didn't get to see the whole 'I do' thing. Why is that? Is it no longer the done thing? Idle minds are wondering. I thought that Nasty Norris ("If an immigration officer asks, I'll be telling them the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but!") might come to your rescue, but no such luck. Instead you're now sitting outside the Rovers with a wedding ring glinting on your finger, your wife on your left and your true love T on your right.
"We didn't think this through," you said. Oh, dear sweet lovely Graeme, I don't think you know just how deep you are.
