Alec had a new side business: an escort agency, supplying middle-aged men for the pleasure of mature ladies. However, one of his gentlemen let him down so he was forced to find a replacement - Ken Barlow. He didn't tell him it was a financial arrangement, though, so when Ken had a nice night at the opera with a charming lady, he was somewhat surprised when she handed over his fee. Nicky was also getting some cash from Alf and Audrey for schoolbooks. He went to number 4 with Leanne and they got drunk and broke a radiator valve; he ended up having to give the £30 to a plumber to fix the damage. Fiona went to stay with her parents for a break, leaving Maxine in charge with Audrey as her assistant. However, when Toyah refused to pay for her haircut, Maxine didn't know how to deal with it, and Aud was able to step up and take charge in a quite magnificent manner. Jon was test-driving an expensive car he couldn't afford, and he showed it off to Deirdre as his latest purchase. He panicked when he was photographed with Deirdre at a Sunliners do - it was going to appear in the local papers.
TUESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 17th and 19th November 1997
Ashley was refusing to work for Fred in the Corner Shop as he'd learned that Fred had got a mate to lower the selling price. He thought that Maud had been conned out of the money she deserved, but Fred won him round by renting him and Maxine his vacant house. When they moved in they found Leanne and Nicky in bed there and turfed them out. Meanwhile Fred got in a shopfitter to sort out the shop - a very young Peter Kay. Maud took advantage of the distraction to drop a fish into one of the units, leaving a nasty smell to linger. Jon was horrified to find a picture of him gazing lovingly at Deirdre in the paper. He had to cut it out of the Gazette quick before his wife saw it. He also had to lie to Deirdre that his posh new car had been stolen. However, Jon had another scheme up his sleeve. He agreed to house-sit his mate's posh home and then, when he was gone, he got in a man from the building society to fraudulently get a mortgage on the house. Continuing the celebrity guest theme, the mortgage broker was played by Phil Collinson, who'd later produce Corrie for three years and mastermind the tram crash. With money behind him, Jon proposed to Deirdre and gave her a ring. Ken threw his cheque at Alec for conning him into being an escort. He was disgusted - until Alec gave him his fee. Suddenly it was all perfectly fine and he signed up for more work. Gail rowed with Nicky about Leanne and he revealed that she could be worse - she could've bought a baby, like the Mallets over the road.
WEDNESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 21st and 23rd November 1997
Deirdre got a visitor at Sunliners, a woman wanting to buy a surprise holiday for her husband and kids. Deirdre was surprised to hear the woman's husband's name was Jon Lindsay as well but wrote it off as a coincidence. Meanwhile Jon gave her a gold credit card to use for herself. The stink at the Corner Shop got so bad people refused to come in. Fred cleared out the stock and got a cleaner in, who discovered the fish behind the counter. Steve gave Jim the money from the development - a lowly £300. He pointed out that he'd invested in the business and all Jim had done was labouring so it was all he deserved. He handed over a cheque and moved out. Audrey found out about Judy and Gary buying the baby and obviously went straight round to find out what was happening. Judy said that it wasn't true, and that the £2000 Zoe had was money she'd stolen off them. Leanne was disgusted that her friend was being slandered and told the Mallets to tell the truth, only for Judy to belt her and give her a fat lip. Les went to have a go at them but he believed them over Leanne and told her to stop telling lies. She then dumped Nicky when he asked her to stop banging on about it.
THURSDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 24th and 26th November 1997
As the whole Street was convinced she was a liar, Leanne went looking for Zoe to back her up. She found her in a hostel. Zoe had already spent all her money and was down on her luck again. She went to see the Mallets, much to their horror. Judy fled with Katie to the Arndale while Gary talked to Zoe. She was a lost soul, not knowing what she wanted out of life, and when he offered her money she got angry and left. With Andy gone and Betty off at Her Gordon's they needed staff at the Rovers, and Alec persuaded Vera to take Natalie back on. She proved her worth by defending Samantha from Les Battersby's advances. She's still an awful trollop as far as I'm concerned. Fred was paranoid about industrial sabotage, thinking another shopkeeper had planted the fish in the shop. Maud confessed to Ashley that she'd put the fish in the counter as revenge for Fred swindling Maureen out of the money she deserved but he kept her secret. Jack discovered Ken was an escort, and offered his services to Alec, while Deirdre bored everyone rigid banging on about her new house.
The Mallets were terrified by Zoe's continued presence on the Street and felt they needed to do something to make Katie properly theirs. They decided to get her christened, and asked Des and Samantha to be the godparents. Des refused because he was an atheist, but he was also distracted by Les continually perving over his girlfriend. She reckoned she could handle it but when he tried it on in the pub Des threatened him. Next morning he woke up to find his car window had been smashed, and naturally assumed Les was responsible. He denied it but later Des's front window was smashed as well. Ashley relaunched the corner shop with snacks and wine, with the Battersbys taking full advantage of the free booze. Fred refused to let Ashley take on an assistant but when he closed the shop for lunch he agreed to get him part-time help - only for Ashley to take on Maud. Fred was livid. Deirdre became even further enmeshed in Jon's lies, buying expensive beds and duvets on his account, though there was a close shave when Jon's real wife almost caught them together in Lewis's. He gave Deirdre a gift as they moved into their new house together - signing the whole place over to her even though he'd be paying the mortgage. The only person who thought it was at all odd was Mike. She thought it was a wonderful gesture. Oh Deirdre.
I cannot begin to tell you how bored I am of the Mallet baby shenanigans. As far as @merseytart is concerned that brain aneurysm can't come soon enough.
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