The Week In Classic Corrie

I've been incredibly busy over the last few weeks and I reached the point where all the old Corries backed up on my Virgin box was just depressing.  Now things are a bit better I'm able to jump back into it and I'll try and catch up.  

MONDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 21st and 23rd September 1994

Bad news: Bet's back with Charlie.  Even worse, he's been knocking off Tanya behind her back.  He was awful the first time, why on earth did they bring him back?  He wasn't around for long anyway because he fled to Hamburg with Tanya, leaving Bet to do her grand lid on a scream act in front of the pub.  That's the end of Tanya though; she only lasted a year but she managed to be pretty magnificently poisonous the whole time. Also back after a long time away is Tracy Barlow, letting herself into number 1 to do her washing and encountering Samir with no shirt on.  (And on that subject, well done Deirdre, you saucy mare).  Tracy was disgusted to learn she was shacked up with a younger man and told her mum so, only for Deirdre to tell her that Ken had knocked up Denise over the road.  New puritan Tracy Barlow considered them to be as bad as each other, though she made no mention of Ken's awful waistcoat, which was a far greater crime if you ask me.  Emily was greatly amused though, the right old raver.  (Incidentally everyone keeps calling him Shamir for some reason).  There was also an interminable storyline about Mavis taking up sketching, Nicky Platt was in a huff with Gail and living with Don - that's a real frying pan/fire situation if you ask me - and Andy left Bettabuy.

TUESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 26th and 28th September 1994

Steve's printing business appeared to be doing well, though it seemed to be mostly front, as he charmed his way into a big t-shirt printing contract.  However he needed £20,000 to clinch it and dashed around trying to get it - only to be refused by the bank because of his criminal record.  He did manage to debut his swanky new pad in Weatherfield Quays, leaving Alma to sulk because Mike refused to go to the housewarming.  Don started working nights in a ploy to get Nicky to move back in with the Platts but he got wise to it and went to his mate's house instead.  Ken tried to win Tracy round but she reminded him that everything started going wrong when he had his thing with Wendy Crozier so he should get lost.  But the highpoint, the pinnacle, the most brilliant storyline was happening in the Rovers.  Raquel organised a tips contest among the bar staff (Jack, staring at their cleavage: "Do you want me to judge it?"  Bet: "Tips, Jack, tips.") which she handily won with Bet.  They spent it on after hours cocktails and, in a single five minute two hander that capped off the first episode, they got incredibly drunk.  Topics under discussion were modelling, smoking and, inevitably, men, with Raquel coming up with a scheme where you put a bit of paper with the name of people who'd wronged you in the knife drawer as protection.  Bet, of course, was able to compose an entire list, starting at A and working her way through the alphabet (and the little choke of horror she made when she said "Don" was astonishingly good).  They ended up terribly hungover the next day but trust me, it was worth it.

WEDNESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 30th September and 3rd October 1994

Mike and Alma were at loggerheads.  She felt ignored, again, and became irritated when he bought another car for the chauffeuring business without consulting her.  He finally agreed to go to Steve's party in an attempt to please her, only for the event to be ruined when Fiona revealed it was all a ploy to get him to invest in Steve's business.  (Incidentally Simon Gregson is clearly in the middle of his "partying" days as he weighs about four stone and is white as a sheet).  Baldwin agreed to hear the plan but didn't invest.  Vicky turned up at the Rovers, summoned by Raquel to cheer Bet up, wearing a choker and looking like she'd just arrived from the Hacienda.  Derek went to the North West Achiever awards with his ex-wife and current employer Angela, which got Mavis's back up.  She spent the evening with Roger, a fellow art student, and he sketched her like one of his French girls.  Meanwhile the winner of the North West Achiever award turned out to be Norris, which really annoyed Derek.

THURSDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 5th and 7th October 1994

Raquel and Curly were friends now, definitely friends, just friends, except in Curly's head where he was madly and passionately in love with her.  They went shopping for his bachelor pad, where they tried out beds together and bought wallpaper.  Andy pointed out his new purchases weren't very Curly, and Raquel was worried she'd pushed ideas on him.  Andy meanwhile was worried he'd not get back into university, which is probably wise, what with it being October.  Mike and Steve agreed to be business partners, with both of them thinking they'd screwed over the other.  Mavis's boring art class was still a thing, as she entered a still life in the contest, but second prize went to a portrait of her by her mate Roger.  Derek was not at all happy to see she was another man's muse.  Bet, meanwhile, got a postcard from Hamburg - signed by Tanya.  What a glorious bitch.

FRIDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 10th and 12th October 1994

Alf got a thrill as he took care of the corner shop to let Maureen and Maud get to the chiropodist.  Audrey was naturally unamused to see him back behind the counter when he should've been treating her to lunch.  Derek was still in a nark about the painting, partly because he was annoyed that Mavis was showing signs of having a life outside her marriage.  Instead of capitulating she doubled down, giving Derek money for his manky old car (which has been replaced by his legendary lime green Paperclipmobile) and keeping it as a runaround.  There was an unexpected visitor to the Street: Charlie, or as Mike called him, Chuck the Truck.  He wheedled his way round Bet, telling her he regretted hurting her and he wanted to come back.  Bet looked like she was thinking about it.  What will it take to get rid of this awful man and his terrible moustache?  Curly got a visit from Mrs Rogers, the area manager, with some bad news.  She said she'd he'd presided over an empire of sleaze and told him there'd been complaints about his conduct from employees - i.e. Kimberley and Elaine.  And to be fair they had a point: he was a bit of an obsessive lech.  Mrs Rogers fired him.  This was unfortunate as he'd just bought a new sofa and now he'd have to send it back.

Shall I rename this "last week in Classic Corrie", because I never manage to get it out in time?  Let me know on Twitter @merseytart.

Classic Corrie is on ITV3 weekdays from 14:50.

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