Who's this, gazing vacantly at his Game Boy and being generally sullen? It's only Tyrone Dobbs making his debut on the show! Jackie introduced her son to Deirdre and announced he'd be staying with them, having been chucked out of his dad's house. Deirdre started to wonder if she'd ever get rid of Jackie - especially when she got herself a job as a machinist at Underworld. Leanne felt that the spark had gone from her marriage to Nick and decided to be spontaneous by surprising him at college. She saw him going off in a car with his tutor and assumed he was having an affair. He managed to put her off, but she followed him the next day and saw him at Miranda's taking his clothes off (Nicky Tilsley Shirtless Count: 7). Miranda explained he was her model but Leanne called her a perv. Greg was spending Sally's money and leaving her begging, unable to pay for food or take the girls out. He took out a potential client, but didn't get the deal, so he drowned his sorrows. When Sally nagged him about money he threw her across the room. Zoe announced that she was going to be purified by her friends at the Etheric Foundation and Ashley wondered if, perhaps, maybe, they were a cult. He's a sharp one, that Ashley.
TUESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 4th and 6th December 1998
Les was still being a pain in the backside in hospital, demanding that the nurses wait on him hand and foot. When Martin was handing out the drugs on the ward, another patient suffered a heart attack, and he rushed to help. Les spotted the trolley was open and snaffled some drugs for his pain. Surprisingly, Les Battersby is not a trained pharmacist, and he had to have his stomach pumped. Martin ended up suspended for leaving the trolley unattended. Zoe attended her purification ceremony despite Ashley's attempts to stop it. He tried to get her away from them but she told him she was going on a retreat. He worried she'd never come back. Greg spent the day getting drunk, much to Sally's horror. Angry, she told him a few home truths about how useless he was at business, and he hit her. She fled with the girls. Rita took them in, but suggested she give Sophie and Rosie to Kevin; he was horrified to see her injuries but she said it wasn't down to Greg. In a happier moment, Tyrone wandered into the garage and met Kevin for the first time, impressing him with his knowledge of cars. Leanne allowed Nick to continue with his art classes because they needed the money, but she wasn't happy about it. She went along to watch him model (NTSC: 8) and Miranda gave her a sketch of him.
WEDNESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 7th and 9th December 1998
Natalie received a pair of unwelcome visitors. First was Colin Barnes, who appealed to her to tell the police the truth about what happened to Des. She feigned innocence, even when Colin sent the police round. Then Tony arrived, full of declarations of love and apologies, and swearing he wasn't dealing any more. However, Natalie found packets of drugs in his pockets. She called the police and told them that it was his friends who had killed Des and Tony was taken into custody. Sally asked Alec how she could get her money back off Greg; he advised her to sweep in and clear out all the stock before he did it. Greg was livid when he found out and went to hit Sally again, but Rita intervened. He swore revenge. He is a really terrible actor, by the way. Les told Martin's manager that he hadn't taken any drugs from the trolley and Martin must've given him an overdose deliberately. He told the manager that there had been bad blood with Nurse Platt for a long time, because he's awful, and rubbed his hands together with glee at the prospect of getting some compensation. Deirdre had enough of the Dobbs taking over her flat and asked them to leave. Fortunately, Tyrone had spotted that Curly's house was empty...
THURSDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 11th and 13th December 1998
Tony returned home from the police and told Natalie he hated her. He left the Street - forever, as it turned out, as the next time he'd appear it'd be as a decomposing corpse. Les returned home to his family's job, but the Platts were less happy. Gail pulled down his Welcome Home barrier and angrily berated him for spreading lies. Les went to a solicitor to see about getting compensation from the hospital, and was advised to ham up his symptoms on the stand to maximise his payout. Zoe decided to leave number 6 and become a permanent follower of the Etheric Foundation. She said she'd been chosen by Nirab to have a baby. Ashley went to the police, who said they knew it was a cult but couldn't do anything as she'd gone of her own free will. Ashley decided he'd have to liberate her himself. Sally tried to offload her stock to Mike, but he offered her a pittance; she decided she'd have to sell it herself on the markets.
FRIDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 14th and 16th December 1998
Martin was depressed at his career seemingly going down the toilet, all because of one mistake. Les, of course, decided to push his buttons, telling him in the Rovers that he deserved to lose his job - and Martin went for him. Roy pressured Gail into deciding whether to sell the cafe, because he had his eye on a premises on Victoria Street. He made some enquiries about what it would take to get an alcohol licence which infuriated Alec. Jackie and Tyrone started squatting in number 7, much to Alma's horror. She tried to stop them but was thrown out on her ear. Ashley, Gary and Nicky went on a mission to the Etheric Foundation to rescue Zoe. They spotted her on the driveway, bundled her into the back of a van and drove her back to the Street. However, she wasn't exactly brimming with gratitude. Indeed, she told him he was boring and that was why she wanted to get the hell away. She announced she was moving to America with Owen from Torchwood to give birth to the Nirab's new messiah. She left Weatherfield forever, leaving Ashley an emotional wreck. And since we're saying goodbye to Zoe, can we take a moment to reflect on what an absolutely insane life she had in the show? She arrived as a pregnant homeless teen, sold her baby, stole it back, the baby died, she had a nervous breakdown, and then she joined a cult. She was like a character from Brookside who took a wrong turn in Manor Park and ended up on Coronation Street. I'd love to know how internationally famous Golden Globe-winning actress Joanne Froggat looks back on her time on the show; it must've been exhausting.
It's Christmas on Coronation Street next week, so even though it's the middle of August, @merseytart will be having a glass of sherry and a mince pie.
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