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Monday 6 April 2009

Coronation Street Weekly Update, April 6 2009

Greetings fellow Corrie fans and welcome to another of me missives. It’s Easter week this week and the update this week is coming atcha smeared in chocolate with a bunny on its roof. And so, without any further ado, here we go with this week’s Coronation Street update.

“I’m not drinking any more,” lies Peter Barlow through his teeth as he sits in th’ospital waiting for Simon to recover from smoke inhalation after the bookies burns down. Ken believes his son and tells Blanche he thinks Peter’s turned a corner. “Let’s just hope there’s not a pub on it,” she grimaces. But Ken’s got more problems on his plate than an alcoholic son, menopausal wife and grumpy Blanche to deal with. He lets the word Deirdre slip from his lips on the barge and Martha assumes Deirdre’s a mate. Ken comes clean and tells Martha he’s married and then she throws him off the boat with tears in her eyes.

There were more tears in more eyes this week when Kirk dumped Julie. Well, she wasn’t right for him and he wasn’t right for her and Kirk tells her so: “You’re a right bossy cow and you never back me up when I tell you I want to be an astronaut or stuntman.” Kirk boxes up Julie’s stuff and she comes to collect her fake fur-trimmed cowboy hat and her collection of, I’m guessing, Take a Break magazines and a James Blunt CD. Anyway, we all know Fiz and Kirk should get back together anyway. It’s just that Fiz and Kirk don’t know that yet and Fiz is being kept busy with Chesney’s worries at school. He’s being bullied by Kenzie Judd and Fiz storms in to school to give Kenzie what for but the headteacher stops Fiz’s fists from flying. It turns out the head is giving Kenzie’s mum a seeing to and so Fiz knows Chesney’s bullying won’t stop. She drags him out of the school with the threat of home tutoring. She asks Ken Barlow first, everyone does, but when Ken declines, she goes to prison to see John Stape and then.. zzzz.. zz.. sorry, I must have dropped off when the Stapester came into view.

Graham’s being a bit odd this week. Just when you think he’s settling down to be a cosy Corrie character, his fascination for arson reminds you that he’s more than a little dangerous. He loves the smell of charred buildings and stares longingly at the bookies. Both creepy and odd.

Talking about both creepy and odd, Norris gets a wake up call when Mary tells him her mother has died. This means that Mary is free to travel, see the world and put her plans into action to leave Weatherfield. Will Norris go with her or will he dither at Rita’s side for the rest of his life? Dither, Norris, dither. Rita likes you that way. But no, dither he does not. When Rita goes on about organising a 70th birthday party for Colin, Norris gets jealous and tells Mary he’ll go off travelling with her after all. Mary’s over the moon, Norris is jealous, Rita’s confused and Emily orders another sweet sherry.

Tina returned from her jollies this week to find her dad still living with Gail and David moved out. She tells Joe that she wants him to take responsibility for his life and sort himself out. But poor Gail’s still got the hots for Joe and wants to continue playing happy families. Luckily for her Joe will meet with an accident next week which ensures he can’t leave her. Ooh, it’s just like that Bette Davis film.

The Windass clan also returned from being “away” somewhere non-specific. Can’t say I missed them, can you? And Lloyd came back from Ibiza only to find that Liz has legged it to Spain where her Andy’s not well and in need of some mothering. The staff at the Rovers now consists solely of Poppy to run the place, change the barrels and sort out the catering for an old man’s birthday bash. This would never have happened when Annie Walker was in charge.

And finally this week, Tony Gordon met with Inch High Private Eye to get some dirt on Luke Strong but his background checks out too clean for Tony’s liking. The only thing we know about Luke Strong that we didn’t this time last week is that he’s got a bit of debt, he’s a friend of the Connor clan and he always goes back for the wabbit.

And that’s just about that for this week.

Coronation Street writers this week were Carmel Morgan, Mark Wadlow, John Kerr and Peter Whalley.

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