Coronation Street episode review, Weds 31 Jan, 8.30pm

Carla has collapsed, Rana and Kate are both crying, Luke's funeral featured an unwanted mourner; his killer. And talking of the killer, Phelan is intent on winding Gary up, so that he will hit him. The cliffhanger? Rana comes clean about the affair!  Well, not quite - she said: "I am in love with someone else." 

So we pick up from there and Zee is distraught and angry. Meanwhile, Daniel tries going after Sinead again, with a plastic plant. Classy! 

Phelan tries talking to Steph and offering his condolences. She is having none of it. Phelan spins this as "the grief talking." But, Steph is talking about Andy, and what she thinks Phelan did to him. Will she bring him down? Who will he go after next? 

Steve is not enjoying his digital detox. Tracy gets him to massage her feet and he is interrupted by a buzzing noise. Is it a wasp, is it a bee? You've guessed!

Carla is in hospital, I hear they are naming a new ward, "The Corrie Ward", as there are so many visitors from.Weatherfield. Roy is by her side, like a loyal Labrador.

Zee thinks that Rana has been sleeping with misery guts, Robert. Barking up the wrong tree, pal. Kate comes clean, after uttering the words, "I'll kill him." This would be a 'duf duf' moment in EastEnders.  Zee delves deep and Kate tells him all the details. Zee finds out that other folk knew, and he leaves the Bistro. Poor bloke. 

Tim packs his clothes and wants out, with Faye by his side. Sally thinks that he is being over the top. But, we Corrie viewers know he is right, as are his reasons for going; Phelan. 

Carla is asked if she has any family, as the search for a suitable donor begins. Meanwhile, Toyah and Eva are in cahoots, and when Adam arrives in the pub to see her, she makes stuff up. Has she not learned that lies bite you on the butt? 

Roy tells Brian about Carla and as soon as he says: "She hasn't told anyone", you know what will happen next. 

Kate has a big swig of a drink. And she tells Aidan. He comes over all judgemental, and then Carla phones and interrupts the drama with some dramatic news of her own. 

Amy finds Steve's secret phone in the not so secret hiding place; a plant. 

Gary susses what Phelan has been trying to do and offers a truce, in terms of 'pretending to get on' for Nicola. Only, Nicola is pretending, also. Still with me? It's all pretend. 

Rana asks Zeedan if they can talk. She cries and is heartbroken. She expects him to take her back. But, this is not Chesney. And the door is shut. 

This was an episode whereby some old plotlines moved, thank god Zee knows, for example. But, the Phelan stuff keeps going on and on. It's as if the producers realised they were onto something big with him, and they don't want to let him go. 

I like Connor's McIntyre's performance, and have enjoyed watching him manipulate folk. But for me, following the flat scam, he should have legged it with Vinny. 

I hope Friday's episodes feature the net closing in on him. 

Glenn Meads

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Coronation Street episode review, Weds 10 Jan, 8.30pm

Phelan has scared the living daylights out of fans, in the previous episode, standing over Seb, and intimidating him. Will this young lad be the next victim? Phelan has him framed as Luke's killer, which is why he gave him the gun to hold.  Poor Seb is frozen to the spot, and in walks Eileen. Phelan distracts her again! How many times can he do this? 

Joseph hears his auntie Beth talking about Luke's murder and runs upstairs, upset. Chesney mentions Katie and you realise this character never got a proper send off. Meanwhile, where are Billy's hospital vistors? Barely anyone has turned up to see him. 

Luke's vigil takes place, as friends prepare to say goodbye. Alya is broken, and Phelan has the gall to turn up. Zeedan says "Rest in peace, bro", as Phelan fakes his grief. 

Maria advises Craig on relationships. Don't listen Craig! Two of her former partners are dead and some of the others were affairs, run for the hills, Craig! 

Tracy Barlow shows a softer side and it is heartwarming to see. On the flip side, Phelan believes his own hype and refers to the racist thugs as "wicked." 

Meanwhile Gemma and Henry strive to get over the 'L' word being used. Gemma truly does love him, but does he love her? What's his secret? 

Seb sits with Phelan in the Rovers, and others arrive to grieve and gossip. Phelan watches like a hawk, when Seb says he is going to the toilet. The lad promptly legs it outta there. 

Aud lights a candle, remember when she fancied our Luke? Tyrone and Kevin give out free drinks. Seb tells Eileen it was Pat and off he goes, bags packed. Will Eileen believe him? I bloody hope so! When Seb tried to explain, Eileen starts to doubt him, but as he runs off and says: "Watch your back", she starts to question herself. 

Craig has no idea what Bethany's secret is, but those of us who have read spoilers do know. But, in case you don't - I am not going to type it here. 

Phelan and Eileen have a conversation about Seb's disappearance. Eileen has finally realised why we have all been shouting at the TV for an age. Get out Eileen! Instead though, she has a cuppa. But her mind is working overtime and she is plotting something. 

Ches has taken Joseph to scatter his mum's ashes, with the hope it will calm the poor boy down. Gemma comes over and says she will be attending the wedding. I hope that Sinead was not making soapy party favours. 

Rana backtracks and tells Sophie to go for it with Kate. Tracy still looks upset but once she sees Daniel, she cannot resist winding him up re the wedding. 

Anna has a vistor request. Eileen has finally woken up and smellled the mellow birds. At long last! 

I know some are upset that Corrie feels a bit grim lately. But, this episode had momentum and fine performances and Phelan's time is clearly running out. What's not to like? 

See ya next week, when we may not be mentioning Phelan any more. Stay tuned! 

Glenn Meads
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Coronation Street Friday 13th October episode review

Hiya! It’s just Jordan with my thoughts on this Friday’s trip to Weatherfield. After a short break, I’m ready to bitch and moan once again about our favourite Street. I can’t pretend that I’m enjoying Corrie as much as usual ever since the inundation of the sixth episode but that doesn’t mean Friday’s episodes weren’t without their scarce positives.

Nicola is still moping around with the age-old soap dilemma of whether to follow in Madonna’s footsteps and keep her baby – or not. Let’s just ignore the fact that Nicola only slept with Gary a mere three weeks ago so clearly holds the world record for fastest plumbing and try to make the best of the irritatingly cliché plot device.  After receiving some advice from new stepmother Eileen earlier in the week, Nicola decides it’s time to visit a friend of her late mother and fill her in on all the daft drama of her life. Lydia is initially thrilled to heard of Nicola’s pregnancy, but supports her choice to have a termination if she chooses to do so. However, Lydia seems to struggle when Nicola casually slips into conversation that Isaac is not her biological father as she had believed for all her life up until four months ago. Things are only made worse for this random new character when Nicola shows her a photo of Pat on her phone. Lydia takes an odd turn; she appears to recognise Pat but won’t let on. Instead, she politely kicks Nicola out. So, yet another clever-but-not-clever twist in the Pat Phelan epic saga. This random woman who claims to know nothing about Annabel’s affair nearly thirty years ago just happens to be linked to Phelan. 

 That Pat Phelan is a very busy man.  Recently, amateur journalist who is apparently sleeping his way to the top (nothing wrong with that), has been covering the story of an apparent award won by Vinny Ashford, Phelan’s partner in crime from that property scam a million years ago. Phelan is now going to desperate measures to make sure the truth doesn’t come out. Daniel visits Vinny’s elderly mother Flora once again in the care home. It’s her birthday and her son always contacts her on her birthday, so Daniel is hoping to get an interview. Phelan, posing as Alan, once again fakes his way into visiting Flora, claiming that she was his aunt. Now, he’s convinced the receptionist to tell Daniel that her birthday was two weeks ago, in order to prevent him getting an interview. With Daniel gone, this leaves Phelan to videocall Vinny – or as it transpires, Harvey - in Flora’s room. After getting the elderly woman to leave the room, he orders his former crime partner to meet him or, along with his mother, face the consequences. Phelan’s not finished yet though. He’s only gone and tracked down Daniel’s boss’s husband and told him what she’s been doing with her protégée. How does he know all these people? A scuffle in the Bistro tells me that Daniel’s journalism career won’t be going much further and neither will Daniel himself, given that when Phelan visits the cellar, he tells Andy he’s found his replacement prisoner. And as if things couldn’t get any more bleakly twisted, the episode closed with Phelan loading a gun.

Can I stop talking about the tangled Phelan web now? Good. What else happened? Well, in scenes that saved the episode from being a tangled travesty akin to EastEnders, Liz is struggling in her new role as an employee at the Rovers. At first, she appears to be loving it; it’s her old job without the stress. Or so she seems. Toyah is unfortunately settling into her role as landlady a little too well – despite the lack of beehive and cleavage. The managerial empowerment is going to her head as she orders Liz to unclog the toilets and doesn’t allow her to have an early finish. Not how Liz used to run the place at all! When Toyah notices a problem with the pump and asks Liz to fix it, the former landlady finally snaps. She goes on her break, helping herself to a large glass of red without hesitation. Toyah’s power made ego is soon shot down, though. Tom Ridley – as in Newton and Ridley – calls in for a pint. He greets Liz fondly and she introduces the new landlady. When Mr Ridley tastes his pint, he is less than impressed. Unfortunately, Liz forgot to sort that dodgy pump out early but she works ever so hard to stifle a smile when Tom announces to a flustered Toyah that he may have to cut off their supply.

 

Elsewhere, Summer landed herself in trouble at school after spray-painting a massive unmentionable on the headteacher’s car as part of a dare. Billy can see she is upset because it is her late father’s birthday tomorrow, but the stubborn genius won’t admit it. Foster dad Todd has landed himself in trouble with the law. Earlier, Alya bought a machine from a dealer, which turned out to be property of the factory before it was cleared out by Adam Barlow. A business card for Todd and Adam’s business was found at the premises where she bought it and now the police are very suspicious. Still, they let him go for the day but are sure to be back in touch soon. As well as all that, the ostensibly broody Rana finally admitted her feelings of lust towards Kate, just after accepting Zeedan’s marriage proposal. The nurse sat and cried about how she may or may not be a lesbian, before Kate decided to do her “I’m not talking to you” routine which she has been doing to just about everyone over these last few weeks. No doubt an affair is long overdue. We haven’t had one in about two months.  Oh, and Mary’s long lost son returned to the country, this time to move onto the Street permanently, brining his African wife with the Manchester accent with him.  

 My God, that was a hard one to review! So much happened but of so little interest. Please stop it with the ridiculously contrived twists and turns in overblown storylines! Although the acting in these storylines must be praised, Corrie’s charm is in its smaller storylines, which are traditionally filled with the camp wit that made Corrie the institution it is. Maybe Friday's episodes simply fell victim to the curse of their airdate.

As always,

Thanks for reading!  

Jordan

Twitter - @JordanLloyd39

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Coronation Street Friday 8th September double episode review

Hiya! It’s just Jordan with this week’s Friday review – actually on a Friday for once! That’s if I manage to get this review up before the stroke of midnight!

Andy wakes up after yet another night imprisoned at the Hotel Phelan, his rhodent roommate looking more comfortable than he does. Eileen is eager to visit the house Phelan isn’t doing up for them to live in, but is fobbed off by her husband yet again.  And the big dramatic twist in this instalment of the current ratings-fisher? Phelan is finally releasing Andy back into civilisation. To make sure he is ready for his departure from the Hotel Phelan, Andy even gets a smart haircut and shave at the recently opened salon, which made Hotel Phelan look almost as good as the Solana. A couple of camera snaps later, and Pat is ready to get him a passport made. Andy only has to wait a week and then he’s free to go. There are only two conditions: he must not make any attempt to contact anyone he knows and he must only go abroad.  It looks like Phelan’s plan is coming together. That is until he drops the photos of Andy in front of Nicola and Eileen. The lies run like a waterfall and both women seem to believe him, yet again.

Gemma’s quest to help Rita continued. As we saw in Wednesday’s episode, Gemma constructed a situation by where Rita received an appointment card for the GP she hadn’t made. Or at least, one she would think she hadn’t made. In actual fact, as we had suspected, Rita had not made the appointment at all and Gemma was taking her meddling to unorthodox measures. As always, Gemma’s heart was in the right place but this is not usually the way you go about testing an old lady for dementia.  The loveable chav reminds Rita of her appointment in a manner that was less than subtle and arranges to tag along with her – so she can get the mole on her behind seen to. Things got rather emotional for a confused Rita when she confides in Norris behind The Kabin counter about her recent memory loss. Later that afternoon, when Liz pops in to buy some pens for the medical centre reception, she mentions in passing to Rita that it is not normally standard practice to allow people to make appointments for others.

The penny’s dropped. Rita hadn’t forgotten that she’d booked an appointment. It was Gemma. Rita cancels the appointment she doesn’t need and this makes for the scene of the episode when Gemma is waiting for Rita at the medical centre and she collides with Moo-ra. The snobby receptionist is spending time working by faffing on with a big bunch of conveniently placed Interflora flowers and Gemma candidly states her husband must have done something really awful to be sending her flowers such as that. Rita later explains  to Gemma that she has started taking new tablets for her blood pressure and one of the side effects is memory loss, news that Gemma is thrilled to hear.

Elsewhere, Faye is at her wit’s end. Her teenage romance is well and truly on the rocks and Seb is refusing to answer her texts. She eventually gets through to him and the pair arrange to meet -  at Faye’s. On the Street where all of Faye’s family who have forbidden them to see each other live. How sensible. As it turned out, the current Romeo and Juliet weren’t caught out but it looks like they soon will be.  The pair of teenage tearaways will stop at nothing to be together, and Faye cooks up a story about a school theatre trip that needs paying for, even conjuring up a fake school letter.  She’s then seen in the back yard having packed a bag, all ready for her weekend in Chester with her Romeo.

As well as all that, the daft drugs drama continued. Will plants drugs in the Bistro in the smug knowledge that it would look as if Rich were to blame. Fortunately, Michelle finds them in the nick of time. Just after finding the suspicious package, the police turn up, which leaves Michelle to quickly dispose of them in the most logical place. Forget flushing them down the toilet or putting them down the sink. She mixes them into the curry. Brilliant. Anyway, this all leads to a violent confrontation between Robert and Rich. Robert, already on a caution from the police, is arrested at the scene, as Will watches from behind the wheel of his car, pleased that his handiwork has played out exactly how he wanted.

I know this review has been a little slapdash; I’ve an early train to catch in the morning. As I type this, it is apporaching 1am so still not too bad for me! A couple of episodes that were dominated by some of my least favourite storylines. However, there was a golden interaction between Gemma and Moira in the medical centre which I’d love to see more of – and as always, the acting of Connor McIntyre and Oliver Farnworth shone brightly in that dusky basement.

As always,

Thanks for reading!

Jordan

Twitter: https://twitter.com/jordanlloyd39

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Coronation Street Sunday 3rd September episode review

Hiya! It’s just Jordan with this week’s Sunday review. That’s a new one, right? Yes, our usual Friday trip to Weatherfield was moved to Sunday evening for something called football. So much happened in the hour-long episode, I’ve hardly any idea where to start.

The horror film drama continued in last night, as Andy’s plight at the hand of evil Phelan dominated much of the episode. Pat has gone to the trouble of finally feeding his hostage, treating him to a chicken Caesar salad. Not that he gets to enjoy it, however. Andy, his health draining rapidly, faints at the sight of the salad. When he comes around, he begs Phelan to take him to a doctor. Surprisingly, he relents but changes his mind at the last minute, calling a trip to the doctors “too risky”. The would-be writer knows that if he does not receive medical help, he will die and Pat coldly leaves him to do so. After all, his long-lost daughter has now bought a flat on the Street and he thinks celebrating with her is more important than keeping Andy alive. It is only when Nicola mentions the death of her parents and how the loss will never leave her, Pat feels a twinge of guilt. Since lying is his second language, he makes an excuse to leave and then gives an Oscar-winning performance to Dr Gaddas at the medical centre to obtain some antibiotics. He arrives back at the one-star Hotel Phelan to find its only guest showing very little signs of life and is left to feed the antibiotics to his delirious victim.

Our Pal Sal is driving her latest hair-brained scheme at full speed. The mare has decided to run for mayor and her campaign is as silly as one would expect from Sally.  After persuading an initially dubious Tim that it is time to revive her political career, she holds an official campaign launch in the Rovers, promising to buy a drink for anyone who attends.  At this ridiculous soiree, to which she has gallantly invited the local press, she evades every question with a fruitfully empty answer, practically changing from Metcalfe to May in the blink of an eye. Among the attendees at the campaign launch is Weatherfield County’s new mascot. After winning a local audition earlier that afternoon, Beth’s Kirky is now the proud wearer of a bee costume. Sally is less than thrilled to have a bee in attendance, but when the journalist begins to take more of an interest in him, she is utterly dismayed. When it is suggested to Kirk that he runs for mayor too, Our Pal Sal almost fainted on the spot.

"You sounded like a real politician then"
"Oh thank you, Fiz"
"You evaded the question beautifully"

"

Another hair-brained scheme is about to take place up in Todd and Billy’s flat. Tracy has sent Amy round to the salon to get a back-to-school trim, but Amy insists on having complicated highlights put in. When David refuses, knowing how much bother he’d get into with Tracy, the stroppy teenager widens her options, seeking help from know-it-all Summer. Together, along with the help of Asha Alahan, they raid the corner shop for household cleaning products such as bleach and baking soda. With Todd having to run out to an emergency at work, Summer opens her dodgy salon in the flat. When Todd comes back he gives them all a telling off and orders Amy to wash her the bleach out of her hair. A piercing scream is heard from the bathroom as a distraught Amy finds Summer’s homemade dye hasn’t quite achieved the blonde highlights she was after; her hair has been frazzled into a startling orange instead! In an attempt to keep all this from Tracy, Todd suggests Amy stays over for the night and then they can sort it before Tracy finds anything out.

However, The Wicked Witch of Weatherfield knows her daughter has been up to something when she asks permission for a sleepover at Summer’s. The self-admitted sneak knows when her daughter is trying to pull a fast one, and marches over to the flat to find out what is going on. She knows Amy doesn’t even really like Summer. Things got even more ridiculous with the use of a hat, which did little more than fuel Tracy’s suspicions further. She boldly rips the hat off and claims she’s going to kill David Platt, until Summer timidly owns up. She goes on a classic Tracy-style rant, labelling the new parents as pathetic, and suggesting to Summer that she puts herself into care.  (On a sidenote, it gave me a daft thrill knowing that the young actress who plays Summer is called Matilda and I made a silly connection to Roald Dahl’s Matilda, who also led her own homemade hair dye mishap!)

"It's flamin' orange!"

Elsewhere, a lovely new friendship is blossoming in the form of Rosie and Gemma. If Rosie is Barbie then Gemma would probably be Sindy and the pair make an unlikely but very entertaining double act. Gemma has confided in Rosie about her growing concerns for Rita. At first, Rosie seems to think she’s fine but that is until she finds a bizarre list in the kitchen cupboard at the flat. Rita has been writing lists of things one would normally remember -  such as “Jenny is going to marry Jonny” and “Norris is allergic to nuts”. Later that evening, Gemma tries to explain her concerns to Rita. They’re both sat watching a soap – the first time I’ve ever known a soap exist within a soap – and Rita is having trouble remembering the name of the woman who always wears big earrings, in what I’m sure was an allusion to Bet Lynch.  Gemma is then baffled to hear Rita recite the intricate details of the storyline; she practically broke the fourth wall with what she said next, uttering what I would call Line of the Year in all of Soapland.

"Alex!"
"Eh?"
"And that's Rachel. Three weeks ago, she went under the wheels of a minibus. Not only that, his brother were driving it! Don't they tell some daft stories?!"

"

An hour-long episode which had a good balance of comedy and drama. The Phelan/Andy scenes are rather sickening to watch but the horror was diluted nicely with the rest of the comedic scenes. And as for Rita’s condition – I am probably in the minority here but I will not be taking part in the #SaveRita campaign. I think, if Barbara Knox wants to leave, then this is the way to do it. Send a fabulous character out on a storyline which will cement her status as one of television’s finest actresses.

As always,

Thanks for reading!

Jordan

Twitter -@JordanLloyd39

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Coronation Street Friday 11th August double episode review

Hiya! It’s just Jordan with my thoughts on Friday’s episodes of Coronation Street. I’m having an incredibly busy summer but I do try to get these reviews done, and if I manage, it will always be before the next set of episodes finish airing. Here we go!

Fantastic comedy prevailed in Friday’s episodes, provided by a prying Liz and a flustered Steve. Steve and Leanne have become the oddest couple on the Street, yet surprisingly not the most contrived. Unfortunately though, the couple who have rushed into a relationship simply because they made a baby, are finding things a little more difficult than they first imagined. Eva and Toyah are both convinced that their sister’s marriage of convenience will last and Liz is concerned to hear that her son is getting no action in the bedroom. This is where the good, proper, natural comedy came into play in Friday’s episodes. Discussing your sex life with a parent is a universal stomach churner, and that universal feeling found its way right onto Steve’s hilarious face. Still, at the heart of it, Liz just wants Steve to be happy. It’s not just Liz who is concerned about her son’s non-existent sex life. Of all people, Tracy is taking an interest in the bedroom antics of her ex-husband. Trying to do something nice for his sudden fiancée, Steve orders a huge bunch of flowers from Tracy. She’s certainly doing business today! Or rather, Mary is. Poor Mary has been left to run the shop while Tracy sups red wine in the pub. This causes a delay in the delivery of Leanne’s flowers, so he demands they are brought round to the pub. Typically, however, the romantic gesture doesn’t go to plan for Steve; it actually earns him a slap across the face! The Wicked Witch of Weatherfield has been meddling as usual, and decides to change the message on the card to something mysteriously naughty! She even quips that Leanne is experienced enough in the bedroom department that there really shouldn’t be a problem for her. This prompts Leanne and Steve to have a serious chat in the backroom, where they decide that this marriage of convenience isn’t all that convenient and they call the whole thing off, with Tracy proudly taking credit for helping someone she sort-of cares about and someone she couldn’t care less about.

"That is the most uncomfortable kiss I've seen since Liza Minnelli's last wedding"

Eva should be celebrating, but she’s not. The scorned blonde bombshell is on the warpath as soon as she watches Aiden leave the florists’. She marches in, demanding to know the recipient of the flowers he has just ordered. Tracy bleats on about client confidentiality, but takes delight in informing her that they were indeed not for her. The cool, calculating Pricey (not Katie) is straight onto formulating a plan, totally blasé about the fact that the sale for the flat has gone through and she is now a homeowner. That blissful blonde brain of hers has become increasingly more vengeful as the weeks have went on, and when Aiden finds a letter from the hospital informing her that her scan is today, she quickly twists together a plot. Aiden has casually announced that he is going to a business meeting, so Eva immediately encourages him to go and she will meet him at the hospital. With the help of Toyah, she prints off a baby scan from the Internet and anonymously reports Aiden to the police for drink driving, in order to delay him getting to a scan for a non-existent baby. Aiden later arrives at the hospital to find Eva waiting outside, fake scan in hand and tells her the tale of the delay, which unbeknownst to him, she constructed. Regret soon falls thick and fast upon the face of Eva when Aiden tells her that today is his late mother’s birthday and thanks to the police stopping him, he has been unable to put flowers on her grave. Salt is poured into Eva’s remorseful wounds when her philandering fiancé is filled with joy over the scan photo. Interestingly, this is the first time we’ve seen Eva show any sort of rueful emotion towards her ridiculous scheme. I’ve said it before – but my opinion still stands that having an affair is not the worst a person can do and Aiden does not deserve to fall victim to Eva’s wickedly immature plot.

“Good luck”

“Good luck? She’s about to show a stranger’s foetus to the fiancé she hates! She’s not going on school sport’s day!”

Elsewhere, Chesney's first shift back at work since the stabbing  goes awry when finds himself inundated by some thugs. He runs outside and stumbles into the medical centre, where he promptly faints in front of Liz thanks to a panic attack. He swears Liz to secrecy about the incident and when he can’t think of any other way to explain his way out of it at work, he quits his job. Fiz plays the level headed big sister role well, calls this a bad move and persuades him to just go home to Sinead. He won’t even confide in Sinead that something happened and the last we see of Chesney, he is still shaken up, jauntily setting up another “issue” storyline. Woo. Hoo. We also saw Rosie finally secure the job as PA for Todd's law firm after proving her skills by taking photos of the scantily dressed husband of a client who rightly thought her husband was having an affair. Why she didn't just mention that she was a PA for Carla back in 2008 I'll never know! Oh, and as well as all that, Michelle did some more sighing before agreeing to a trip to Brighton with Robert and Gary accepted his offer for that dodgy illegal job offer in Germany. Silly man!

A brilliant couple of episodes with comedy that flowed naturally and some deliciously cheeky dialogue. Thank you, Mr Alexis-Rochefort.

As always,

Thanks for reading!

Jordan

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