Merry Christmas everyone! Except for Alma, who was thoroughly distraught at the revelation that Mike had a son. She worried that he would leave her for his ready made family but he assured her he had no intention of doing that. He then snuck off to deliver a present to Mark - only to discover Ken Barlow with his feet under the table. Ken gleefully sent him packing. Des and Curly went off to Blackpool on their LADS LADS LADS Christmas. Des promptly found Lisa on the seafront (in December? They must've been freezing) and gave her a pressie. They also had a bit of a snog. Bet laid on a girly lunch for her, Raquel, Rita, Phyllis and Denise, with a strict No Men - and especially No Reg Holdsworth - entry policy. During a game of charades, Phyllis revealed she loved Madonna because she brought back corsets, because Phyllis is ace. At the Platts, a big family Christmas/birthday party for David with Ivy and Audrey was interrupted by Carmel. She'd returned early from Ireland because she missed Martin so much; she told everyone else she'd missed the ferry, even though she left a week ago so basically it sounds like she's been sitting on the dock at Holyhead for days. She is quite insane.
TUESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 28th and 30th December 1992
Denise continued to cause a stir on the Street, as Reg, Jack and Doug made a bet over who would be first to pull her. Bet overheard and told her. Denise consequently made plans with each man for a date on January 1st. Carmel conned Martin into going out with her and the kids and played happy families. Martin finally lost his patience and told her she was mad and she should get lost or he'll tell her parents. He pressed her to get a flat, and when she claimed it was gone, Don intervened with a flat owned by a mate of his. Mike was convinced Ken was only seeing Maggie to annoy him, a theory that made Deirdre call him disgusting and made Maggie slap him round the face. Ken went to see Mike and told him to stay away; Mike had agreed not to go near Mark until he was 18 and he needed to stick to that. The two men had one of their patented barneys in the middle of Mike's living room though it didn't spill over into hilarious fisticuffs. Alma was rightly furious.
WEDNESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 1st and 4th January 1993
Why did the producers hate Denise so much? I only ask because she spends most of today's episodes being perved over by Reg, Doug and Jack, plus she's got a stalking from Don and a baby with Ken in her future. Denise Black is way too good for the lot of them. Anyway, she turned the tables on the lecherous trio, getting them all over to her flat to be laughed and pointed at by the ladies of the Street. Loopy Carmel went to view her flat with Martin and told him it could be their lovenest. When he left her to it, she returned to number 8 and told Gail that her and Martin were in love. Gail saw right through her and chucked her out, though part of her thought he might have been leading Carmel on. Des went to Blackpool and told Lisa he loved her. They agreed to be together, though maybe not on Coronation Street opposite her in-laws. The McDonalds remembered the anniversary of Katie's death, with Liz visiting her grave, a touching storyline that has been absolutely torpedoed by events in 2018.
THURSDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 6th and 8th January 1993
Tracy Barlow began her long career of being an interfering madam who ruined people's lives by revealing to Mark that Mike Baldwin was his real dad. When Mark confronted her, she admitted it was true, and he was understandably distraught. In her fury, Maggie revealed to Tracy that Deirdre and Mike once had an affair. Deirdre confessed and Tracy called her out for her hypocrisy over Wendy flamin' Crozier. Vicky returned to the Rovers to celebrate her 16th birthday just as Steve passed his driving test. They reconnected, with him apologising for mucking her about. She told him that Alec had a girlfriend down in Southampton. Lisa's dad accused her of being a trollop for dallying with Des so she moved back to Weatherfield, upsetting Vera. Meanwhile, a new one way system was causing traffic problems for Alf, with Coronation Street being used as a cut through for lorries. This isn't ominous at all.
FRIDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 11th and 13th January 1993
The speeding cars claimed their first victim as Audrey was knocked over outside the shop. She got away with a broken wrist but it spurred Sally to action. She started her path to being the glorious monster she is today by organising a petition. Vera was about to sign when she saw Lisa's name on the list and started shouting that she wasn't a resident. Jack tried to persuade her to be tolerant so that she could get to see Tommy, but Vera being Vera, she screamed at Lisa and suggested that Terry would murder Des when he got out of prison. Steve was eyeing up a car at Kev's garage but couldn't afford the insurance. Vicky arrived with the money she got from selling her horse and paid it for him, much to Bet's disgust. Tracy was still reeling from the revelations about her mum's infidelity. Deirdre tried to talk her round but she said she hated her and that she was a "rotten cowing tart". Obviously Deirdre couldn't tolerate that kind of language and slapped her. About time somebody did.
The campaign to get "rotten cowing tart" in the dictionary starts here. Voice your support on Twitter @merseytart.
Classic Corrie is on ITV3 every weekday from 14:50, with a repeat the following morning from 6am.
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2 comments:
I wish Martin had told Gail from the get-go about looney Carmel trying to seduce him.
I also dislike Des so much this time round, I used to like him years ago but now he's getting on my nerves.
And Ken, I've never liked him so that hasn't changed!
What was Raquel going on about over Christmas dinner? 'Sniff-fur dogs and sea king helicopters'?!
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