It's the new year after the night before with Daisy humiliated after finding Beffanee in a towel chez Daniel. Getting off with your stepdad's uncle is a bit icky, no? I do hope Beffanee is wearing thermal tights, I'm just been up north to visit relatives and it wasn't leather shorts weather. Whilst I'm acting mumsy, I'm also worried about Lauren's kidneys given her penchant for crop tops.
Anyhoo, the Platts meet up with their wayward youngest (erm, apart from the wayward Mad Max and the reasonably well behaved Lily) and all is great until Daisy starts yelling at Beffanee in the street and Sarah and her daughter start slut-shaming each other. I guess it makes a change for a Platt family meal to go wrong in Speed Daal rather than the Bistro. There's also some badinage between David and Beffanee so I guess she's forgiven him for hiding E in her doll in 2007.
Oh and Shona goes all meta and does a horrified "LUNDUN?", which is, as we know is Talk Of The Street's thing!
Sarah should be more worried about another returning face - Dastardly Damon is back as his enemies are now in chokey (we probably have the hardest working woman at Weatherfield PD, D.S. Swain, to thank for that) and he wants revenge on Adam. He tries to sweet talk Sarah, finds out that she miscarried his baby (was that really last year? seems an age ago) and then when that doesn't work, decides to kidnap Adam. And I thought I was having a bad day after having a mere 4.5 hours sleep. It's a truth universally acknowledged that anyone walking near a black van in soap isn't going to have a great time. He is driven to that bit of wasteland near the canal where all Weatherfield gangsters go to do dirty deeds, although Damon decides not to kill him after all as Adam's last words are about Sirrah and Harry. Adam's not an eejit and he goes straight to the cop-shop to report a kidnapping. Adam's hair looks quite good at the moment, I do hope it's not going to be ruined by a kidnap and a panic attack.
New year, new Ed as he swears to lay off the Paddy Power and sell the builder's yard to pay his debts. Gary, who hasn't had a storyline since Rotten Rick, moots buying it. Hopefully this'll be the end of the gambling storyline, at least until Aggie is released from the props cupboard where someone accidentally locked her last June.
Over at the pub, Daisy has found something dead in the cellar. Only a mouse and not one of the many murdered people over the year.
And finally, Paul's hand fails whilst he's eating lunch, so Summer feeds him. I have to say that when this storyline was first introduced, I thought they'd have to kill off Paul quite quickly as I reckoned that an able-bodied actor playing a disabled person might be problematic, but I have to say that Peter Ash has handled this very well.
Oh and if someone could make me a sound file of Dame Maureen saying "I'm hungry. And I'm bored" from Friday night's episode so I can make it the start up noise on my phone, I'd be appreciative.
Rachel Stevenson - still on twitter
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