‘Forgive me Father for I have sinned’ begins Gail, but she’s
not begging forgiveness for herself, she is suggesting, somewhat obliquely,
that Kylie should be doing this, with a few Hail Marys thrown in for good
measure. Gail bangs on about how she can’t stand this much longer, meaning the
pathetic self-pity and the insensitivity. She talks of Kylie being an absolute
disgrace and how she, Gail, has had connections with Max’s school,for thirty
years and how much she has helped there,
even falsely claiming to be on the PTA. David does something right, for once,
and interrupts her claim to all things morally superior and asks her, ‘What are
you saying? That you’re perfect?’ At least she admits she has not been perfect.
‘I’ve got my faults and plenty of them.’
When Kylie appears, she says, ‘Morning,’ in a reasonably
civil way. Gail has to take issue with her. ‘Morning! Is that all you’ve got to
say?’ Gail speaks of Kylie in the third person, not a very endearing or
successful method in building bridges. ‘Is she going to apologise? She reminds
Kylie of how she has humiliated Max in front of all his friends. Kylie,
sensibly, says sorry. Gail reminds Kylie that she has a long way to go to make
this right. Kylie tells Gail that she only said sorry to shut Gail up but it
didn’t work. Gail is exasperated as Kylie heads off to work, while her mother- in-
law shrieks, ’She’s not fit for purpose!’
Perhaps Gail could write a book, entitled, How Not
to be a Mother in Law. It’s just
a shame she’ll be too late to catch the Christmas market.
On arrival at the Bistro Leanne gives Kylie a verbal warning
which swiftly changes to a final warning. Leanne now tells Kylie that she has traumatized
Max for life, by dragging him off the stage. Kylie asks who isn’t traumatized for life and
a gasp could be heard around the nation as Leanne tells us that we are all
products of our parents.
Nick chips in with
how despicable a thing it was to take Max off the stage, to which Kylie says, ‘Despicable
Me’ referring to the children’s film and amusing the viewers. All those
criticising Kylie and claiming space on the high moral ground have all done the
despicable themselves – Despicable Mes – doesn’t quite work…
Kylie spills the beans at the Bistro, which Gail tries to
dismiss as the ‘mad ravings of a drunk’ but Sally is persistent, wondering why
Kylie would have said that David tried to kill Nick, if it wasn’t true.
Welcome light relief comes from Dev just about to tuck into
his high calorie, though enticing looking breakfast, when along comes Kal. Covering
the breakfast with his newspaper, Dev tells Kal he has to work, but then checks
in his diary and has to admit that there, in black and white, is his 10 o’clock
appointment with Kal. ‘What’s this?’
asks Kal, as he uncovers the breakfast, to which Dev asks, ‘What’s what?’
After a brief lecture on the causes and evils of the
American obesity crisis, Dev defends our friends across the pond by using Usain
Bolt as an example of what is good about America, but as Kal points out, Mr
Bolt is Jamaican, so Dev’s futile argument collapses and now he will be put
through his paces by an unforgiving Kal as Sophie turns up for her shift.
Sophie is proving to be much the better sister, even though
neither she nor Rosie will be eating their turkey with Tim, Sally and Faye. Rosie will be partying it seems but Sophie
will be helping at the soup kitchen, to which news Sally asks where is her Christmas
spirit. Oh Sally. More amusement from
Sally in the shape of her catty comments about Carla’s shoe habit, and yet,
when Carla rings she is all sweetness and light. In fairness though, it’s a
rare soul who has never done something similar.
So, it’s Christmas shopping list time at The Rovers. ‘Do you
like parsnips Amy?’ asks Michelle. Apparently Amy has never heard of them.
Nobody likes sprouts apparently, but when Michelle decides they won’t bother
with them, Steve comes over all traditional and says they are ‘compulsory’ as are Christmas pudding and Christmas cake. ‘You
don’t like currants,’ says Michelle, once more in the guise of Steve’s mother
and Steve, as her 6 year old child. And then Steve’s phone rings and it’s Andrea,
asking Steve about whisky for her dad, Roger. Michelle does not like that! Why
is she ringing Steve, Michelle wants to know. ‘Because I’m a publican’ he says,
as if stating the obvious. ‘Publican – school boy you are.’ Michelle! What are
you saying?
Then, something that I found barely explicable - Michelle
asked if it was Andrea who wrote the jokes in Christmas Crackers. What…? Any
explanation of what I see as at best, a weak joke, would be most welcome.
How wonderful to see Andrea in the flesh - wonderful for us,
that is, but not Michelle nor Liz. Cool to the point of rudeness, how unpleasant
they showed themselves to be. As Steve
and Andrea chatted, we were given an insight into how ‘matey’ and in tune Steve
and Andrea are. The revolving door episode was true after all, and we learn
that Steve was with Andrea. Obviously guilty, Steve semi -shushes her as she
reveals this.
An ‘even unhappier than before’ Michelle states that Andrea
is not as advertised. She is attractive, smart and warm as we clearly witnessed.
Tim is giving Roy’s Rolls’ windows some elbow grease as Roy
and Hayley set off to chemotherapy. No doubt Tim regrets asking if they’re
going somewhere nice. Roy pays Tim and Tim claims to be searching for the £2
coin, for which Roy waits, until Hayley wordlessly explains.
It was very upsetting
to see Hayley looking so gaunt and ill, and suspecting that the tumour is
growing. Her last Christmas is this one and she knows it, but nevertheless she finds
warmth and amusement in Becky’s card wishing her a Fabaroo Christmas. Remember
that Gail said Kylie made Becky seem like Kate Middleton. A good line!
Tina, Rob, Peter and C arla – where will this all lead? I
can’t be alone in feeling hopeful that Tracy will discover Rob and Tina
together, just so that Tracy will be upset. I have no wish though for Carla to
be upset. As she said tonight though, girls like Tina don’t grow on trees. How
could Peter disagree?
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7 comments:
Maybe Steve will run away with Andrea once he gets his education. He'll find that both Michelle and his mom Liz are intellectually beneath him and that Andrea is a better match for him...
I am sick to death of Michelle and her so-called 'acting'....which consists of crossing her arms. I've never seen anything like it. She is at panto level at very best. What a joke. So Steve is not allowed any friends at all? Him and Andrea are clearly mates. Michelle is beyond pathetic. And so very very rude. I hope he dumps her soon. And speaking of mates, where has Lloyd been lately?
I can't even watch those scenes anymore. Who are these writers and how do they get away with writing such drivel?
Yep Michalle and Sean whose acting and work behind bar at Rovers is just standing there arms folded. What an impression!
What I liked about Andrea was that she was attractive in a fairly ordinary way, just the sort you might see in any shop or office. Totally unlike the glamour babes of Corrie who are evidently engaged because of their looks rather than acting skills. Michelle has hardly any reason to be jealous unless she realises Steve might be looking for a more equal relationship than the one he currently has.
Never thought I'd say this, but since he started cleaning windows, Tim is finally growing on me. Perhaps it's because it reminds me of Stan Ogden. Or perhaps because Tim is now actually seen to be doing something and it makes him less of a waste of space.
Hoping the new year sees Steve dumping Michelle for good!
Ah, Bromance. Best light relief in a long while, thanks to Jason & Tyrone. Just a half. A pint, it's Christmas. :D
Synchronized Sourpusses: the double arm cross twins. Ughhh! Yes, Steve's childish behavior is ridiculous. But it's time for Michelle to seek greener pastures. What a cow, and to a customer in her pub -- imagine if Tina or Sean did that. Andrea didn't seem all that pretty to me, and she made an effort. The only bonus here is seeing that guys can like fun girls more than gorgeous ones.
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