Bananas: Mon Oct 11, 2010 Corrie Episode Review

Wow! It’s October already! I can’t believe how many reviews I have missed.  Well, my apologies dear readers.  Don’t worry – I have quit my day job.  Well, not exactly, more or less just ended a contract!  Now I can concentrate on more important things – like Coronation Street.  Naturally.

Written by Joe Turner (7:30) and Mark Wadlow (8:30), directed by Noreen Kershaw.

It’s the morning after for our Chesney after the “best night of his life.”  Yes, after his beloved Katy stayed the night.  Otherwise known as the night that our Chesney became a man.  For some of you, this is unsettling.  Some of you could care less.  It doesn’t take him long to try to hush the woman out of his bed as soon as the next morning.  Of course, he fears getting caught.  He tosses her a yoghurt, and she’s off just in time for when Fiz and John come downstairs.

Later, Izzy gets questioned by the gestapo her father about where Katy was the night before.  Izzy clearly didn’t know that Katy and told their dad that she was staying at hers, but tried to cover quickly.  Not quick enough, as Owen suspected something off the bat.  Owen finds Katy and aggressively catches her in her lies.  He accuses her of lying to him and guilts her by telling her she’s supposed to be the “strong independent one.”  Poor Katy stalks out after telling him she was at Chesney’s and that he never listens to her – ever.  Later, Izzy wants to know why Katy didn’t tell her about spending the night with Chesney.  She wants to make sure that she slept with Chesney because she liked him, not just because she wanted to piss off their father.  Later, Izzy tells Owen that he needs to back off yelling at Katy and pay more attention to her.  Owen wants to punch Chesney in the face.

Meanwhile, Chesney gives Katy a gift of a watch.  Chesney’s shocked that Katy told her dad about the fact that they were together and even more that her father didn’t care.  Chesney goes to Katy’s to give her some flowers and winds up getting Owen slamming him up against a wall instead. Owen says that his latest conquest (ha-ha) is his baby girl.  Chesney says that he loves Katy and wouldn’t do anything to hurt her.  Katy comes down and Ches and Owen pretend like nothing happened.  Later, Chesney tells Katy what her dad did and says that Owen’s a psycho.  This reminded me of this old song. 

Just as John is cuddled up on the couch with H.D. Wells on his day off, there’s a knock at the door.  Who should it be, but Brian, his old teaching mate from the “Stapewick” days asking how Colin Fishwick is doing.  Apparently, Colin’s mum has been trying to track him down.  Didn’t think about that, did ya, John?  Brian tells “Colin” how his mother’s been calling looking for him, but he couldn’t give any information out.  John makes up some lie about “Colin” not getting along with his mother because his mother can’t abide by Fiz and he has chosen.  Brian tries to ask John/Colin what is going on.  As they’re in conversation, there’s another knock at the door.  This time it’s Owen looking to punch Chesney.  This is awkward, as Owen comes into the house and tells “John” that his “son” Chesney is sleeping with his daughter.  “John” tries to correct Owen that Ches is not his son, but his brother-in-law, but Owen doesn’t care.  Brian is sitting in the back with his ears perking up every time he hears Owen calling Colin “John.”  Which, was about 8 times or so?  Brian’s confused and asks Colin who John is.  John tries to tell Brian that “John” is a nickname, but Brian can see the fear.  Brian is excited to hear about the story.  What is with these bored teachers? 

John lies to Brian about how he really is Colin Fishwick but has assumed the identity of John Stape.  John being his middle name, and Stape being his mother’s maiden name.   He tells Brian that he witnessed a murder, which is why he’s living in secret.  He tells Brian that he must keep his mouth shut, and gets his word.  He tells Brian that he left in such a hurry because he was afraid that he’d be found by “Mr. Big.”  Oh, lord, I can’t even type this it’s so crazy.  Brian gets funny on John and says that it’s sad when he left and he knew they’d be more than just colleagues.  Fiz arrives home and Brian tells a shocked Fiz that Colin/John has told him everything.  John quickly tells Fiz about “the murder” and she has to play along.  Brian decides to take control of his life and reinvent himself.  What, he’s like Madonna all the sudden now?  When he leaves, Fiz says she’s about to commit a murder!  John tries to explain and Fiz is back to being upset again. 

As Brian leaves John’s place he catches Julie as she stumbles off the bus and drops her shopping bags burst out all over the sidewalk.  They bond over the best of Neil Diamond and Julie drools over how many times he’s seem Neil perform live.  John and Fiz find Brian and Julie sat together with a couple of glasses of red in the Rovers and their jaws drop.  Especially when the two break into a duet of “You Don’t Bring Me Flowers.”  Her Barbara to his Neil.  John asks if this is glee club.  Julie is surprised that they know each other, and Brian says they go “way back.”  John doesn’t want Brian mingling with their friends and sets out to break them up.  It’s no good, as they’re already planning on going on a date and back to Brian’s place later this week. 

It’s an awkward morning at the Dobb’s when Tyrone asks Molly if she and Sally had a good time the night before.  Molly says it was kinda weird, and Tyrone says his night was a bit weird and all.  Tyrone’s day is about to get weirder, as Jack says that he wants him to take him to a lap-dancing club, since he’s never been.  Pfft, if anyone believes that one.  Jack bullies Tyrone into going, and they act suspicious in the Rovers when Emily asks them where they’re going all dressed up.  She mentions that they need a new roof for the church and she’s accepting donations.  Meanwhile, Molly sees Ty speed off in Steve’s cab all dressed up and of course wonders where he’s at.  Sally comes over later and Molly tells her about how Ty snuck off into Steve’s taxi and that he’s gone to a lap dancing club.  Sally thinks it’s no big deal but Molly’s not happy about him going there and spending money when she’s at home alone with the baby. 

Tyrone arrives home later and tries to hide the fact that he’s all dressed up by slipping his coveralls over his dress attire.  Molly hands him the lapdancing card that he dropped earlier.  BUS-TED.  He still tries to lie about it, but Molly knows what’s up.  Molly gives Tyrone the third degree about going to the lap dancing club.  Tyrone insists he did it for Jack, and Jack insists that he did.  Later, when Tyrone tries to defend why he spends so much time with Jack, he blurts out that Jack has little time left.  Molly wants to know what he’s on about so Tyrone tells her.  Molly is, obviously, upset and Tyrone is glad to have someone to talk to this with finally.  Jack comes in and Molly, in tears, hugs him and Tyrone apologizes for telling her.  Molly promises Jack that they won’t mope or tell anyone else, but they’ll cherish every moment with him. 

Gail has been spying on Deidre Barlow’s smoking habits outside of the medical centre and poo-pooing this habit of hers.  As though it’s any of her business.  Clearly, still bitter about being passed up for Deirdre by the hunky “firm, but fair” Dr. Matt.  She soon gets bored, then complains to her family about having to cut back since she’s unemployed now.  It was like the missing chapter from “The Book of Who Cares.”  Brilliant. 

Graeme complains to David about how his career is going down the toilet and that he can’t take care of Tina.  Graeme wants some support from David, but David says he’s not come to the right man.  Obviously.  Tina finds Graeme and David in the Rovers and doesn’t seem happy to see her boyfriend with her almost-rapist and leaves.  Graeme asks Tina later why she was rude to David and she says that she hates David’s guts.  Tina tells Graeme that he has to choose between her and David. 

Norris is still trying to convince Rita that it was Graeme that stole their identities and stole from them.  Rita shakes her head as Norris goes on about how Graeme just plays dumb but is clever in a manipulative way.  Gee, who does that remind me of?  Norris also accuses Tina of being Graeme’s insider/gangster moll.  Just then, he gets a call from the police, whom of which are currently eating pies in their cars.  He informs Norris that the person who stole their identities was a computer repair man, that Norris hired on the cheap.  Its all Norris’s fault, and Rita thinks that Graeme and Tina deserve an apology and getting Tina to come back to work.  By the way, Mary’s still on with these competitions and has one on the go where you can win your weight in bananas.  If anyone’s interested.

HIGHLIGHTS

- I loved Gail’s creepy malicious spying on Deirdre having her fags outside of the medical centre in spite!

- David’s little peanut butter beard has finally matured into full-grown stubble, and now you know?  It ain’t half bad. 

- When Emily talked about her “first time” and how her “mouth was watering” of course thinking that Jack and Tyrone were going for a posh meal, and not to a lapdancing club. Steve not knowing any of this, except that he’s taking Jack and Ty to the lapdancing club, and only being very confused and perplexed.  Poor Emily! 

- Norris to Emily: “How many bananas do you think I weigh?” 

- Was Julie wearing a dress printed with cupcakes?!  Fantastic. 

- Brian and Julie dueting in the Rovers!  I hope Brian stays around longer than Charlotte!

- John to Fiz about Julie and Brian: “This relationship cannot continue. Unless you want the father of your unborn child carted off to prison…again.” 

LOWLIGHTS

- I can’t say that I’m really taken with Owen.  I never really was.  I find him manipulative, arrogant and generally unpleasant.  That’s all.

- Poor Katy, with a father like that!

- The lies just POUR out of John’s mouth.  I wonder why he never considered writing a book?  Could be quite popular, if it’s autobiographical.  Under psychological thrillers.

- How many times did Owen call John “John” in his little conversation with him about Chesney?!  You could have made a drinking game out of it!  “John, is that okay John? Got it John? John, John, John.”