Coronation Street Episode Review Friday 14 February

Greetings Corrie fans it’s Kelly here with your Friday night review.

In Victoria Court, Gary is in Maria’s dressing gown making her breakfast in bed whilst singing Toto. He tells her she deserves a bit of Valentines Day pampering (I mean not warbling dodgy 80’s soft rock hits would be a start) and books for her to get her nails done before rushing off to attend to some business. Not long after he leaves Ryan turns up acting shifty with a mysterious package which he refuses to hand over to Maria. Maria’s suspicions are immediately aroused. Not sure why because Ryan only has two facial expressions: shifty and bewildered. He once tried to convey the emotion of astonishment but it was mistaken by everyone for trapped wind.

The other street residents are having a rather mixed Valentine’s Day. In the ‘loved-up’ corner are  Sarah and Adam (despite trying not to flaunt it in from of Shona-deprived David); Cathy and Brian, who are wooing each other with a rendition of Lady Marmalade and Tim and Sally, though she is far less keen on his idea of them getting matching tattoos.

In the ‘it’s complicated’ corner are Bethany and Daniel. Having spent the night together they have an awkward meeting in the café, which quickly turns into full-blown horror show when they’re met with the righteous fury of Beth Tinker. Reminding them that Sinead has only been gone for four months she shames Daniel, who then tells Bethany they should stay away from one another. Later he confesses to Adam, who tells him that if he does like Bethany he needs to just deal with people’s reactions. Clearly not one for procrastination, Daniel finds Bethany in the Rovers and announces to everyone that they’re now an item and they should all get used to it.

Also having trouble with the mysteries of love is Ed. In the Bistro he meets Danny, an old mate working there as temporary manager, who tells him he’s come out as gay. When James arrives, Ed introduces them but it’s quite clear that they already know each other pretty well. When Ed leaves, they sneak into the kitchen (where no food preparation is taking place) and have a kiss. James says he doesn’t want his dad finding out, but Danny tells him he thinks Ed is more open-minded. As his dad is at that very moment sitting on the sofa with Aggie making Larry Grayson jokes, (Ed mate nobody under 40 got that reference at least update your casual homophobia to the nougties), he may be being a little bit optimistic!

In the ‘just give me the feckin’ chocolates and let me eat myself into a diabetic coma’ corner are Abi and Ray. Having found out her fella is a sex pest she confronts him, but he plays it down inviting her to his charity ball and sending her a Valentines hamper. Acting like he’s won her over, she tells Bethany that she is biding her time and is going to bring him down. As the event is in full swing Bethany, Alya and Daniel all watch to see what Abi has planned. Grabbing the microphone, she introduces Ray’s previous victims to the assembled crowd and tells them what Ray tried with all of them. Furious he drags her into the kitchen (again no one working in there) and tells he that while he’s a rich, respected bloke who does a lot of work for char-ridee, she is just a junkie slag who no one will believe. Abi toughs it out but is clearly upset. Stealing Ray’s car keys, she ignores a concerned Kev’s pleas to not get herself in more trouble, drives it away and torches it whilst singing Disco Inferno (which was actually the least terrible song of the night!) 

Meanwhile back to Gary and Maria. At his lock up Gary gives one of his desperate ex-customers £200 to pay off a less friendly loan shark. This is overseen by Maria who of course gets the wrong end of the stick. As she sulks in the barbers, Dr Ali turns up and before you can say ‘I only came in for a trim!’ they’re bonking on the leather sofa. Obviously it was a slow day for customers. Probably best as the waiting area might need a bit of a going over with a wet wipe! As they get dressed, Ali rather smugly assumes they’re back together, which made me go off him a bit...that and the straggly hair…and the appalling tattoos <sighs and stares off into middle distance>.

Back at the flat, Gary has decorated with the sort of pink abandon that even Barbie might reject as being a bit much. Arriving back from her appointment with the doctor, Maria has a face like a slapped arse. She accuses him of still being a loan-shark and says she’s sick of being lied to and treated like an idiot (if the shoe fits). Gary promptly produces Ryan and his ex-customer to back up his story and then tells her that the reason for all his secrecy was that he was going to propose.

To Maria’s surprise he then pops the question again…but will she say yes? Should she say yes? Tell me what you think in the comments section or catch me on twitter @mskelstar

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