Last Chance Saloon: Peter is, as we used to say for last chances, "Playing on his face card"
Sensitivity award: Tracy slagging off Peter in front of Simon.
Cat's out of the bag award: David knows Maria's secret. Steve knows Tina's secret.
British Justice award: Gail's burglar only got 12 months and will only do half of it.
Wordplay award: Stef thought "consummate professionals" were something to do with wedding nights. Well, they are the same word, just different meanings.
Running Man award: Steve and Lloyd... are they past it? Or are they up to a 5K run.
Lines of the week:
Carla "If the booze don't kill him, I will"
Tracy "I can't imagine anyone less WAG-like than Mam"
Carla "I'm like the black flamin' widow"
Carla about Peter "He can't love anyone enough to break the cycle. Not his wife, not his son. Not anyone" (got that, Tina?)
David to Maria "I've pulled some daft things in my time but this is really up there"
Deirdre "I still miss me perm sometimes"
Kal "I'm a big boy, Dad, in case you hadn't noticed" (Do they ever really think of you as all grown up?)
Rob "We buy dodgy stuff and sell it to dodgy people"
Deirdre "Clearly money makes you romantic"
Steve "That's how moral I am. Anything for an easy life"
Gail "I've seen that face before. It's got Leanne Battersby written all over it" (and she's right)
Lloyd "How many miles are in 5 kilometers?" (Steve's right. you're a cabbie, right? 3 miles)
David about the cops "You know what we call that? A whole load of toothpaste" (that won't get put back in the tube)
Deirdre about Tracy "I see RTracy like I see asparagus. An aquired taste" and "You don't just marry a bum. Take it from one who's tried. Several times. Samir's was like two space hoppers in a hold all"
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My nominations are:
ReplyDeleteRudeness in Retail Award - Sophie; a masterclass in how not to sell milk, bread & beans.
Mental Mentoring - David & Maria; welcome to Psycho School - if this continues Maria may become interesting!
Is Food Fun Award?
Gary & Izzy having "Skinheads on a Raft" (Beans on Toast).
Tracey is an acquired taste (Asparagus).
Leanne has been around a bit (Reheated Casserole).
Ugly Sisters Award - Michelle & Liz continue their abuse of Steve.
...and finally
Time to be Murdered Award! Will Tina live for ever?
Perfect summation of a relationship: Engaged? Yup, like a public toilet.
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