Friday, 30 April 2010

Living Dangerously: Thu Apr 29, 2010 Corrie Episode Review

April-29-2010

Written by David Lane, directed by Durno Johnston

Well, Lewis has spent the night on Grassmere as expected and Audrey couldn’t be happier.  Audrey asks if he’d like butter or spread on his toast, and he pulls the  butter from the fridge suggesting they live dangerously to which Audrey replies that she already is to her standards.  With their bellies full of butter, Lewis kisses Audrey and heads of but only after agreeing to meet in in the Rovers later that day for a drink.  Audrey comes in late to work with a smile on her face andApril-29-1010-Audrey-Lewis Natasha immediately notices.  Audrey accuses Natasha, and Michelle who’s in the chair, of being “man mad” and that she’s not like that.  Just as she does Lewis walks on in to tell Audrey she has to “work.”  They agree to go for lunch instead and Lewis is hesitant about being so public with their relationship and Audrey can’t figure why since “everybody knows.”  Perhaps because it hurts his business?  Or they might see Rita in there and she might tell a different story of why her she doesn’t use Lewis’ services anymore?  Nick joins them for a pint and asks how her and Lewis met and Audrey answers that they met at a ‘do.  Well, it’s not a lie.  Rita lets it slip that Lewis had accompanied another woman to said ‘do and Nick thinks it’s interesting that Audrey stole someone else’s boyfriend and wants to hear more.  Audrey and Lewis talk later and Audrey realizes she doesn’t even know where Lewis lives and he says his life is all very boring and lonely.  He leaves and Rita sidles up and tells Audrey she’s fooling everyone but her including herself.  Audrey tells her how Lewis spent the night and Rita reminds her that the man’s a professional.  Audrey insists it’s a normal romantic relationship but Rita tells her she’s a meal ticket.  Rita wonders how Audrey can live with the fact that Lewis is always going to be a gigolo and it’s only a matter of time before a woman who’s younger and richer comes along.  Rita tells her she’s making herself a laughing stock and that they both know this’ll all end in tears. 

Norris awakens in his bed in the cottage to Mary tugging on his ear to awaken him.  Norris tells her of a dream he had of him being Indiana Jones where he’s April-29-2010-Mary-Norris almost going to get crushed to death by a boulder.  And they say dreams don’t mean anything.  Mary brings Norris breakfast in bed and she tells Norris she can see the resemblance between he and Indiana Jones – especially in his new jim-jams. *shudder* Once fully awake Norris gets on the phone to Rita about how obsessed Mary is and how he’s beginning to think she doesn’t sleep at all.  He complains about how Mary kept him up all evening with competitions.  Mary walks in plops down a pile of competitions but Norris tries to avoid it by suggesting a walk but Mary insists that they need to finish their competition entries.  Norris gets ready for his walk and asks if Mary has a map of the area – to which she says she doesn’t.  Norris fears he might get lost on foot so suggest a run out in the motor home instead.  Mary ignores his pleas to leave the cottage and continues dreaming on about potential contest winnings picturing her and Norris travelling the world on free holidays. 

Oh my.  It seems that Norris has fallen on the sleep covered in competitions and Mary slides in and rests his head on her bosom!  The gall – ech.  She wiggles his ear again and he awakens to find himself where he lay and he was having that bad dream again.  Mary tells him that he was being a very naughty boy since it’s been a while since a man has ventured “there” and points to her bosom.  Norris immediately denies venturing there and she calls him silly and offers a sherrApril-29-2010-Anna-Royy.  Norris wants a bath and an early night and hopes for a brand new day tomorrow. 

Anna’s in a state at Roy’s and can’t even manage to toast bread to it’s full golden-browness so Roy asks what’s wrong but Anna only says “sorry” and leaves to cry  in the loo.  Roy suggests she go home and take the day off to have a lie down.  David sees how upset Anna is and calls Gary.  Gary meets up with David in some back alley somewhere when David tells him how upset his mum is.  Since when does David care?  Gary says Len is coming back from holiday so he can’t hide out at his place anymore and needs to move on.  David insists that Gary let his mum know he’s alright but he says he can’t and asks David to keep an eye out for her.

Back on the street David knocks into Anna and she’s in a mood thinking he bumped into her on purpose.  Anna tells him how Gary’s gone missing and and David’s feigns surprise.  Anna can’t understand what goes through young lad’s heads.  

April-29-2010-Natasha NuNick has hired a new barrister for his mum’s case and David snarkily tells him that everyone will give him his credit due for it.  Graeme is there and overhears that Nick is going out with Natasha and is mildly upset at his loss.  The boys try to scare Nick over Natasha reckoning she’s a bunny-boiler that could turn *like that.*  Carla’s got Nick running around like a chicken with it’s head cut off and it looks like he’ll have to cancel his social plans for a second night in a row now.  Looks like he’ll have to cancel on Natasha again.  Natasha’s gutted when Audrey is the one to tell her that Nick can’t make it because of work after she’s waited for him and he never showed.  She better not give him another change or I won’t feel sorry for her anymore.  Natasha goes to Underworld, presumably to see if Nick really is working, or to ask why he stood her up.  She sees him sat in his office with a bottle staring at the ceiling and walks in saying she gets the message figuring he’s hiding away from her.  Natasha can’t understand why he doesn’t want to go on a date with her and admonishes him for how he treated her.  You can’t change a man – don’t try!  She then realizes that he was on speaker phone with a customer after her rant and eats her words then apologizes.  Before she leaves he kisses her and promises to make it up to her. 

HIGHLIGHTS

- Natasha and Michelle holding in their *gasps* when Lewis comes in and thanks Audrey for “last night” under his breath – to which they heard.

- Graeme jealously warding Nick away from Natasha.  

- Mary telling Norris he’s been a naughty boy since it’s been a while since a man has ventured to her bosom.  Pattie Claire is great!

- NuNick referring to Carla has “wonder woman.”

- Celine Dion’s “All By Myself” playing in the pub as a disappointed Natasha walks in after Nick has cancelled on her again.

- Poor Audrey for letting herself get swept up in Lewis.   

LOWLIGHTS

- Mary saying she can see the resemblance between he and Indiana Jones – especially in his new jim-jams.  Yeah, Indiana Jones in one of those fun-house mirrors maybe.

- Norris noting that Chianti sets off his irritable bowel syndrome like none else.  Ugh, more TMI.  Maybe he and Mary were made for each other after all. 

- That smarmy NuNick and the way he treats Natasha.  He’s so slimy!

Overall Episode Rating: 6/10

Drama: 7/10, Humour: 6/10, Classic Corrie: 6/10, Wow Factor: 5/10

Sacha Parkinson chats about Sian and Sophie

There's a nice little interview over on ITV's This Morning website with Sacha Parkinson, who plays our very own Sian Powers on Coronation Street.

She chats about filming the kiss scenes with Brooke Vincent (Sophie Webster), and what might be in store for Sian and Sophie over the coming months. Check it out if you can.

Spot the Corrie prop - April 30, 2010

Well done to an anonymous reader who guessed that the last Coronation Street prop came from Peter and Leanne's flat above the bookies. The candle sits on the windowsill in their flat.

Have a look at this week's props and see if you can tell which house they're in on Coronation Street?

Don't ring in, it's just for fun.

Fab Photo Friday - April 30, 2010

I know it's nowhere near Christmas but this Coronation Street front page from The Radio Times was too good to resist for our Fab Photo Friday today.

Sue Cleaver signs new Corrie contract

There's some great news for fans of Eileen Grimshaw. Actress Sue Cleaver has signed a new contract to stay another 18 months on Coronation Street.

The Mirror says that Sue feared she might be for the chop after her drink and driving ban earlier this month.

Now then, can Eileen have a proper storyline, please Corrie?

State of the Street: April 2010

What a month was April in Weatherfield! The lost of one baby was mourned, and another baby was clinging to life in spite of his maybe-father wanting rid. Love was found in all the odd places and unrequited love rears it's unhinged head as the month ends. Liar, liar, pants on fire, and that's not just Stape's mantra, it could also be Lewis's. For all the details, have a read over here for the State of the Street for April.

Thursday, 29 April 2010

Deirdre and Tracy in happier times

Found this photo of Coronation Street's Deirdre and Tracy, before:

a) either of them had been "inside"
b) Tracy got Samir's kidney
c) Deirdre had her perm

Wonder what became of the little girl who played young Tracy?

Kate Ford in Now Magazine

Yeah, sorry about this everyone. But there's an interview with Kate Ford in this week's Now Magazine (dated 3rd May - not online yet).

It kicks off with the usual tedious weight loss story - like every other celebrity mum, she bangs on about how much fat she dropped after having baby Otis (now two - and not twenty five as I guessed in a previous comment) - a whopping four stones in twelve months. Which I suppose is quite a lot - but honestly, who cares? If she'd kept it on, she could've doubled up as Fat Brenda's ankle or something.

Anyway, in addition to her re-appearance this year, Kate says she will be returning to Corrie full-time in 2011. She reveals that the Coronation Street powers-that-be had been trying for a year to persuade her to return, and it wasn't until the death of screen grandmother Blanche that she felt the time was right. Personally - and no offence to Kate Ford, because the character, even when played by the previous actress whose name escapes me, has always been vile - I find Tracy Barlow hard to take. She's just too horrible. And by the by - does anyone know - has she still got Samir's kidney?

WIN! Liz McDonald's lingerie

A few years ago I was given a set of lingerie that had been part of the Corrie wardrobe for Liz McDonald on Coronation Street (don't ask!). Anyway, the full set of 100% silk lingerie including pants, camisole top and matching dressing gown is now up for auction in aid of the charity Leukaemia Research.

Corrie fans might remember seeing Liz McDonald on-screen wearing this lingerie, she wore it many times when she was dating gangster Fraser Henderson and he kept her locked up in his flat.

You can place your bid to win the full lingerie set, which has been fully washed, and comes with a signed ITV Certificate of Authenticity, on eBay here.

Come on folks, this is to raise funds for a very good cause and for any Beverley Callard fans out there, well, this is a must-have!

Helen Flanagan signs new contract


Amidst the axings of Natasha, Claire and Ashley, there's some bright news concerning Rosie Webster, as actress Helen Flanagan has signed a new contract keeping her on the Street for another 12 months.

Reports today broke the news, and I have to say I'm quite relieved, I saw her as a potential victim to the incoming producer's cast changes.

What do we make of Rosie Webster on Coronation Street? I get the impression she's quite like Marmite with our readers!

Natasha's leaving the Street

Just a couple of days after it was announced the Peacocks are moving on to pastures new, it has been revealed today Natasha Blakeman is leaving Coronation Street too.

Hairdresser Natasha, played by Rachel Leskovac, will be part of a dramatic storyline towards the end of the year leading up to her departure and the show's 50th anniversary.

Another disappointment for me, Natasha is one of my personal favourite characters and I'll be sad to see her go. Personally I think she has been criminally underused, and most of the time a glorified extra working in Audrey's. What are your thoughts on Natasha's departure? And who do you think will be up for the chop next?

Extra Corrie epsiode on Sunday night

Coronation Street's got an extra episode this weekend, it's on ITV at 8pm on Sunday 2 May.

If you'd like to know what's going to happen on Sunday night, have a look here at the official ITV Corrie site.

Sneak Preview of next week's Corrie, May 2 - 7

Without any piffle, here's the storyline for the week ahead on Coronation Street, all wrapped up nicely in 50 words or less.

Week of Sunday 2 May to Friday 7 May
(Note extra episode on Sunday night)

The Barlow’s mourn Blanche’s death, Sean decides to track down son Dylan, Norris runs away from scary Mary, Graeme helps Tina recover, Gary returns to the Army,. Graeme moves into the Platts and Kirk and Izzy go on a date

The full weekly preview, with pictures, is right here on Corrie.net

Missed last week's Corrie?
Catch up with the Coronation Street weekly updates.

Steve McDonald gurn of the week, April 29 2010

It's Thursday and that means only one thing... time for the Steve McDonald gurn of the week. Thanks go to Coronation Street fan Martin S. for sending in these fab Stevie McGurns. If you've captured a good Corrie Steve gurn and want to share it via the blog, do email it in. To see more gurnage from Stevie McGurn, have a look here, there's loads. Some good, some bad and some really very funny.

Wednesday, 28 April 2010

Kids! Win a chance to write for Coronation Street

Soap manufacturers Imperial Leather are now one of Coronation Street's 50th anniversary brand partners. And they're offering schools the chance to write a storyline for Corrie in a very special competition.

Other prizes on offer include a Corrie VIP day for the teacher and the chance for a Corrie cast memer to visit the winner's school. How cool is that? Quite, I'd say.

Entry packs and all sorts of Coronation Street online goodies are to found at http://www.imperialleather.co.uk/

Betty Driver in hospital

The Sun reports today that Betty Driver, who plays Betty Williams on Coronation Street, is in hospital with a chest infection.

Hope you get better soon, Betty!

Vote for Corrie in The Oggies Awards 2010

Forget the Oscars and the Emmys, we've got The Oggies! It's the first ever Coronation Street Blog Awards and the only soap awards where you can vote for any - past or present, dead or alive - Corrie character in each of the categories. There's only 10 questions so what are you waiting for?

Make your vote count in each of the categories at The Oggies 2010. Vote here.

Interview with Corrie writer Jonathan Harvey

It's not often that one of the Coronation Street writers is interviewed but Jonathan Harvey has a play at the Liverpool Everyman right now, called Canary, and so he's in the press quite a bit at the moment.

There's an excellent interview with Mr H in The Guardian today where he talks about the new play and says this about his work at Coronation Street: "Joining Coronation Street was the best thing that could have happened. It was like finding an AA meeting where everyone has the same hang-ups as you. Plus, it gave me the chance to put gay relationships into 8 million living rooms."

Rovers turns into a dating hotspot

Ciaran's here to stay on Coronation Street and he's going to make his mark in the pub. He's decided that the pub is turning into a boring place and thinks that organising a speed dating night will bring in some extra money for the pub and launch a few of cupid's arrows at the same time. As you might expect, the idea doesn't go down well with some of the punters.

Norris always has an opinion, for one. Ciaran gets Rosie to dress up in her hotpants and deliver posters around Weatherfield to entice all the lonely people. If Ciaran and Nick participate, I'm betting Natasha will be in there like a dirty shirt, and so will Michelle. I hope there's a few strangers to balance off the Street's singles and it should be a good laugh if nothing else!

Tuesday, 27 April 2010

Coronation Street: Fat Brenda

As part of Coronation Street's 5oth this year, wouldn't it be great to see Fat Brenda from Levenshulme, at last?

She's one of the best Corrie characters that we've never seen and I feel it only fitting for her to put in an appearance on the show's special birthday this year.

I'm not the only Corrie fan hoping to see Fat Brenda, fan Chris M left a comment here saying exactly the same thing. And Gadgee also left a comment on that post saying that he thought Fat Brenda was probably really slim, because Curly was nicknamed on account of his straight, flat hair.

So come on, Corrie fans, let's start the petition now to bring Fat Brenda to life on Coronation Street - and leave your comments below!

Coronation Street Weekly Update, April 26 2010

Ahoy me hearties and welcome aboard the good ship Weekly Update. If you start to feel sea-sick, just put your head between your knees and whistle up your gang plank. And so, without any further ado, here we go with this week’s Coronation Street update.

Find out more about the Coronation Street Weekly Updates and why they’ve been written for th’internet since 1995 at http://www.corrieweeklyupdates.btinternet.co.uk/

The big story this week has been Molly and Tyrone’s car crash. There they were, in the middle of nowhere on a country lane, upside down in a smashed up car and before you know it, two fire engines and an ambulance arrive quick-sharp after Tyrone struggles out of the car and flags down a woman who calls 999. Molly’s rushed to hospital where she and the baby are going to be fine and Kevin hangs around the ward like an unwashed bedpan that’s due in the sluice. When Molly gets discharged from th’ospital (and does anyone else miss Nurse Martin Platt?) she tells Tyrone she wants to move away from Weatherfield. Go on then, Molly, shift yerself. Just leave our Tyrone where he is.

For a middle-aged fella in a cardigan, Lloyd does a decent job of chatting up Cheryl the stripper. That is, until Teresa the girlfriend comes into the cab office and puts a dampner on things, asking about the whereabouts and thereabouts of the missing Fat Brenda.

Oh, come on Corrie, we HAVE to meet this woman. I bet she’s really thin; it’s like Curly, who wasn’t.

Big “Eugh!” moment of the week came when Eddie Windass appeared at the foot of his stairs in his y-fronts and vest. At least they looked clean. He and Anna are fretting over Gary who’s gone AWOL but what they don’t know yet is that Gary’s in the shed. David finds him hiding and the two of them share a beer and crisps in the Platt kitchen where talk turns to mothers and which one of the two lads is the most grown-up, or not. “You’d still be on the breast if she let yer,” Gary tells David. There’s a disturbing truth in that statement that hits David hard and he lays into Gary before throwing him out to go AWOL back in the SHED.

Big “Haha!” of the week came from the Barlows where Deirdre’s made hummus. Hummus! I know! Deirdre! “I’ve gone all sophisticated and continental,” she tells Liz before finding out they’ve got mice in the hice. And that was the cue for comedy trouser time as Deirdre put elastic bands around the bottom of her trousers to stop the mice running up her trouser leg. Ken just laid traps and poison which was much less fun to watch.

Big “Aww!” moment of the week came when Sian and Sophie made up and decided they were going out with each other even if it felt weird and they didn’t know whether to make their relationship public, or not. It’s sweet, it really us.

Another couple of female friends back on track are Rita and Audrey, where in a lovely moment Rita came into the salon to see her friend and book an ‘air appointment. The camera angle was such that we saw Rita in the salon mirror so it appeared Audrey had her back to her friend as Rita delivered her apology. Magical stuff. Mind you, Audrey’s fluffy head has been turned by Lewis who tells her she’s the special one and he’s off the meter with her from now on, she no longer has to pay for his attention and time. Rita’s wise to Lewis’ game, she knows he’s a bad ‘un but will Audrey listen? Like as not, no.

And finally this week, Norris and Mary go to Bronte Country in the motorhome with Kate Bush’s Wuthering Heights singing them off the Street. Once they’re cosied up in their cottage on the moors, they set to comping but first there’s dinner and Mary cooks up a storm for Norris to eat with spicy chorizo sausage ‘Toad in the Olé!’ She confuses Norris when she tells him she had to do a spot of laundry while cooking dinner because “my brassiere got soaked right through.” She’s a marvel, is Mary, but Norris doesn’t seem to have noticed that yet.

Coronation Street writers this week were Joe Turner, Julie Jones, Stephen Russell, Chris Fewtrell and Simon Crowther. Find out more about the Coronation Street writing team.

Glenda Young
--
Blogging away merrily at http://flamingnora.blogspot.com/

ITV to screen tribute to Blanche Hunt

ITV will screen a special tribute to Blanche Hunt, played by the late Maggie Jones during the week of Blanche's funeral.

The programme will be narrated by ex-Corrie actress Denise Welch who played Rovers Return landlady Natalie Horrocks (and recently shocked the nation by revealing she snorted cocaine on the cobbles).

The programme will be called Goodbye Blanche and it'll look back over Blanche's life, with clips of her best bits and of course, some of her wonderful sarcastic one-liners. It'll be on ITV next month.

Blanche Hunt's death reveals Street surprises

The wonderful Inside Soap magazine landed on the doormat today and there's a great article about the upcoming sad storyline about Blanche Hunt's death. However, it doesn't sound as if it's all going to be tissues and issues, oh no. Remember, this is Blanche we're talking about so the sound of sarcasm from beyond is sure to linger on. Anyway, the magazine reveals that Blanche has found herself a boyfriend in Portugal and was on her way home to Weatherfield to tell Deirdre and Ken all about him. However, she's struck down by a heart attack before she gets the chance.

And then, as Deirdre struggles to cope with the grief of her mum's death, she finds an envelope in Blanche's room, marked "In the event of my death" and it's Blanche's requirements for her funeral. The prospects of fulfilling Blanche's demands will prove no easy task...

Hmm, I wonder what Blanche's requirements can be? Knowing Blanche she'd have asked for Paul O'Grady in tight satin shorts, twirling a baton and leading a funeral procession that includes every single member of the 1o'clock club, whether they wanted to be there, or not.

TV's worst couples - yep Molvin is right there

I signed into my Hotmail account today and came across a story called "TV's Gruesome Twosomes". The top couple is our very own Kevin & Molly.

An excerpt:
When Coronation Street's Kevin Webster and Molly Dobbs embarked on a torrid affair, few could believe their eyes; many more covered them instead [...] Quite simply, Kevin and Molly's affair has backfired spectacularly. Fans hate it, critics think it's ridiculous and actors Michael Le Vell (Kevin) and Vicky Binns (Molly) have had to, in effect, defend the storyline.

Kate Ford's son not allowed to watch Corrie

Kate Ford, who plays psycho Tracy Barlow on Coronation Street, told New! magazine that she's not letting her son Otis watch Tracy on screen.

Kate said: “When Jon’s away and we Skype each other, Otis gets quite distressed afterwards and looks behind the computer. So it might be confusing for him, especially if I’m screaming and shouting. That would be really disturbing, wouldn’t it?”

Tracy returns to the Street son when she turns up in a jail cell with Gail McIntyre.

Bruce Jones gets suspended jail sentence

Bruce Jones, who played Coronation Street's Les Battersby, has avoided going to jail for dangerous driving. The actor admitted last month that he yanked at the steering wheel of his wife Sandra's car as she drove along a busy road. Jones, 57, was drunk and shouted "I'll kill us both" when the incident took place as his wife drove along the A55 in north Wales last August. Jones was sentenced today at Mold crown court to eight months in prison, suspended for 18 months.

The actor pleaded guilty to dangerous driving a day after a jury heard his wife's evidence about how he subjected her to years of drink-fuelled physical and emotional abuse. He has since vowed to give up alcohol and save his marriage. Jones showed no emotion as recorder Simon Medland handed down the sentence.

It should have been me

Joanna Lumley recently said that she'd love to walk the cobbles of Coronation Street again. Her first appearence was as Elaine Perkins, one of Ken's many girlfriends. "Ken asked me to marry him and I said no," she recalls. "I thought, 'Why can't I say yes so I can be in it for longer!'"

She also says she was up for the role of Martha Fraser. "I was nearly going to be the woman on the barge who Ken had an affair with. I begged the producers to alter the filming dates because they clashed with mine but they said Stephanie Beacham had got it."
It's probably too soon for Ken to have another fling but it would be nice to see her back all the same. What do you think?

Special Friend: Mon Apr 26, 2010 Corrie Episode Review

April-26-2010

Written by Chris Fewtrell (7:30) and Simon Crowther (8:30), directed by Durno Johnston

Tyrone is anxiously packing Molly’s suitcase at the hospital awaiting their return home. Molly tells Tyrone she wants to leave Coronation Street because of all the bad memories it holds. She wants a fresh start for their family. Tyrone, for the second time ‘round, isn’t happy about a move. Tyrone tells Molly that they’reApril-26-2010-Moly staying put, then puts his feet up. Tyrone tells Kev how Molly wants to move to Chester again. Kev says if he could choose, he knows where he’d go. Tyrone tells him he should move then. Yeah, why doesn’t he? Kevin basically does all he can to encourage Tyrone to move with Molly to Chester. Later, Tyrone tells Molly how Kev seemed like he couldn’t just wait for him to go and that he must want him rid. Molly tells Ty to stuff Kev, all they need is what they’ve got. Tyrone begins to change his opinion on them moving and looks at Vera’s old chair reckoning that it’d be depressing if they died there, and Molly notes it’d be depressing if they lived there. Tyrone fantasizes about his new home: it’ll have a white door, grass in front, and a neighbour named Brian who comes ‘round all the time cause they’re mates. Yeah, just don’t introduce Molly to this Brian. I know he’s just made-up, but I wouldn’t put it past her.

April-26-2010-David-Natasha David’s finally back at work sweeping up hair. He’s not doing a very good job since Audrey reckons she can see a “clump” of Emily Bishop and she’s not been in for a week. Audrey cuts hair in clumps? Something was rather funny yet eerily gross about that exaggeration. Natasha comes in and wants to know if Nick mentions her, but Audrey says he hasn’t. David finds Lewis’ little black book and Audrey immediately snatches it back leaving Natasha and David to tease her over her “special friend.” Rita arrives for her appointment and Audrey shushes out Natasha and David so they can talk about Lewis in private for some peace and quiet. Lewis calls and Rita’s got a face on her. Rita asks Audrey if she’s still seeing Lewis and Audrey tells her yes. Audrey defends Lewis but Rita tries to warn her again so they agree to differ.

Alone in the salon later, Audrey spies Lewis’ black book and her curiosity gets the best of her. She looks at notes for otherApril-26-2010-Audrey-Book clients, items like likes and dislikes and what kind of tippers they are. She then begins to look very grave as she’s probably reading her own page. They didn’t show it, but it probably goes something like this: “Audrey Roberts: One Hot Mess.” Lewis comes a knockin’ and isn’t welcomed with a smile. Lewis suggest they get a drink at the Rovers since he has time, and Audrey asks how much that’ll set her back. It appears he’s noted that she’s only an “average tipper.” Ouch! She hands him his book and gives him the boot telling him she’s going to end their little arrangement. Lewis does his best win Audrey back but she’s resigned. He won’t leave her distressed ignoring her pleas to leave and kisses her passionately winning her back like *that.* Lewis makes it out that he’s also falling for Audrey and he doesn’t want her to be a client anymore. Now that that’s sorted, Audrey is making fun of all the other pathetic women in Lewis’ diary including Rita. Audrey wants to go for a drink to celebrate their coming together, but Lewis reminds her he’s got an “appointment.” She requests that he come by for a booty call coffee at hers later to which he agrees to. Audrey meets Rita later who inquires about the smile plastered across her face.

April-26-2010-Audrey-Lewis-kiss Lewis is on his next date with a divorcee complaining about her husband and nattering at the waitress over her dirty glass of wine. I suppose he’d rather be with Audrey right now. He arrives at Audrey and tells her how insufferable his appointment was. Audrey exclaims, “I am a gigolo, get me out of here” to which Lewis corrects her and says “escort.” You can put lipstick on a pig, but it’s still a pig.

Norris is biding time shuffling the magazine rack around when he should be packing for his trip to Bronte Country. Norris even tries to use leaving Rita in the shop as an excuse not to go on holiday with Mary. Emily reminds him that he can’t cancel a trip on Mary TWICE. Norris tells them how Mary is a dear friend but lets her emotions get away with her and he doesn’t want to become the victim of said emotions. Emily and Rita encourage Norris to enjoy the free holiday and the beautiful country with it’s fresh air. Norris points out that fresh air did nothing for the Bronte sisters who were all dead by forty. He makes a good point – not.

They’re packing up the RV and Mary regales Emily and Norris with tales of the workings and non-workings of the RV April-26-2010-Scary-Marylavatory. Just delightful. Emily sees the pair off as Norris tries to dig his heels in. As they get in the car, Mary turns on the music and somewhat sings along to a song with the lyrics, “possess you.” They arrive at the cottage and Mary just revels in the splendid isolation, and we all know how Norris feels about that. Oh, I could do for a week away in a country cottage myself – even if I have to wake up to Scary Mary. I might be completely out of line here, but why doesn’t Norris just come out and tell Mary he has no romantic inclinations towards her? Norris is upset to find that he has no phone reception on his mobile and the nearest phone is a pay-phone down the road quite a bit. Mary surprises him with a romantic candlelit supper which doesn’t alleviate any of his anxiety. Finally, Norris relaxes when Mary produces the competitions she’s brought for them to complete on their holiday. They share memories by the wood stove and Norris feels it’s time for bed and wishes her goodnight and he’ll see her in the morning. Mary tries to keep him awake, but Norris is off.

April-26-2010-Sophie Good news for Dev and Sunita – Maria’s house is theirs! Sophie comes in and asks Dev if he’s hiring since she needs a job. Sunita offers stocking shelves for a couple of nights a week. Sophie breaks the news to her dad that she’s got a part-time job since she doesn’t want to sponge off her parents for everything. Kev allows her to take the job as long as her grades don’t slip. At work later, Sunita asks Sophie if everything’s alright now after that “boy” that she got upset over. Sophie says that everything is, eventhough she’s not back with any boy. Sunita is confused and Sophie attributes her recent lift in mood to the fact that she’s seeing her friend, Sian, this weekend.

Well, it looks like Gary’s still AWOL, but he’s definitely not far from home. In fact, he’s jumping fences into his backyard asApril-26-2010-Creepy-David his arch-nemesis, David Platt, reveals himself from behind the clothes-hanger in his own backyard. David asks him what the story is. In Darryl’s old shed, which is now Gary’s fugitive hideout, and the two of them can’t figure out what AWOL really means or what an acronym is. They decide to forget it and have some cans and crisps. It’s not long that David and Gary go from amicable to hostile. They’re both accusing each other of being mummy’s boys and it doesn’t end there. Gary then asks David for his word that he won’t say anything to anyone about him seeing him.

In other news, NuNick manages to blow of Natasha again and she claims he’s got one more chance with her, then he’s blown it. Yeah, we believe her.

HIGHLIGHTS

- Sophie’s conversation with Sian about what they ate for breakfast. When you’re in love every conversation is a good one.
- Natasha and David rubbing their bodies and “oohing” teasing Audrey over her “special friend.”
- Mary and her “possess you” song moment as they hop into the RV for the off. Creepy, but funny.
- Watching Molly hobble around on her crutches. It just seems so forced that it’s funny.
- Tyrone saying he likes curly fries, since they look like little shock absorbers.
- Molly telling Tyrone that there’s a record on the internet of every webpage he’s ever viewed on there and the guilty look on his face as he tries to blame Kirk
- David creepily swinging the clothes-hanger in the backyard to reveal himself as he catches Gary hiding out in his yard.
- The conversation Becky has with Rita over adoption was quite nice.

LOWLIGHTS
- Audrey saying she could see a clump of Emily Bishop on the floor when David was sweeping up in the hair salon. Eww….
- Audrey shoving Rita’s head forward in the stylist chair when she mentions “romantic figures.” That was a bit much, no?
- Mary complaining about the lav in her RV, hand-rinsing her brassiere - this woman needs to tattoo TMI (too much information) across her forehead.
- I felt bad for poor old Audrey realizing she’d fooled herself into a relationship with someone only after her money as a client.
- Mary thinking she looks like Nigella Lawson. On what planet?

Overall Episode Rating: 8/10
Drama: 7/10, Humour: 9/10, Classic Corrie: 9/10, Wow Factor: 7/10

Monday, 26 April 2010

Coronation Street's line of the night, Monday 26th April

It's a toss up for me tonight between David's: "I've given you crisps!" when he was turning on Gary Windass (after they'd be getting on so well, too!) and Mary's: "I had to hand rinse a brassiere!" which was, let's be honest, way too much information.

Lines like these are what makes Corrie brilliant.

Corrie hits Thailand and Taiwan

Coronation Street fans in Thailand and Taiwan can finally start watching Corrie on TV there as ITV has announced plans to increase its Asian distribution.

From June, Granada TV programmes will be distributed via cable TV systems in Thailand due to a deal with Thai Cable Holdings, while in Taiwan they will become part of Chung Hwa Telecom's TITV package, which will be available on the IPTV platform from July.

Anyway, that's all well and good but it's got me thinking. Which country is our farthest flung fan watching Corrie in? Are you somewhere far away and unusual?

Coronation Street: A Likely Story

Reprinted with permission from fab TV blog PauseLiveAction

Just when I thought that Waterloo Road would be the only show which I would pick fault with every scene due to my employment in education, along comes a pretty dire storyline from the team at Coronation Street.

For some unknown reason, the powers that be are still flogging the terminally boring character of John Stape. A man who has returned to the screens more times than a cuckoo has to a clock, he is the only character that can have a saucy affair with a flighty, saucy young minx, find himself beaten up twice, spend months in jail, be at the centre of a wedding plot and stage a kidnap and still be less interesting than a debate with Ken Barlow over which colour is better between light grey and pale green.

The latest ploy to try and make John entertaining (rather than the more obvious idea of axing him) is to have him steal another teacher’s identification and begin working in a secondary school under a false name. This is a man who must have a bear-like tatooed lover back in the nick as he seems pretty damn desperate to go back there. He’s still boring mind you, but I don’t know if I’ve mentioned that.

What we’ve seen is John steal an old colleague’s ID, apply for a job Monday, be interviewed on Thursday and get the job and working there on Friday. I wish being appointed to a school was this quick! This is a procedure that normally takes weeks but this is by far the least troubling of the many plot-holes. Firstly, how is John going to get references? The staff who knew the man John pretends to be (Mr Fishwick) will be more than likely to ask him if it’s okay to write about him. It’s standard practice in education (and all other walks of employment for that matter) to contact your referee and give them the heads up that you need a reference in advance.
Secondly, a criminal police check can take up to and including 6 weeks to come through. And we are expected to believe that the school will let John come into the school and work unsupervised the day after he gets the job? I don’t know of many schools who would take that risk!

And how does he expect not to be caught? The other staff in the school are bound to have come across Weatherfield High before seeing as it’s not too far away. School staff visit other schools all the time for educational visits, sports competitions, meetings and other jobs. Just by word of mouth, the silly man is going to come undone at some point. He even forgot to answer to his fake name when called into interview for goodness sake!

I love Corrie but sometimes they treat the viewers like idiots. The plot scripting at the moment needs some serious tweaking. Even if this fake teacher plot were accurate, it would still be nauseatingly dull. And as for the Molly and Tyrone stuff, the sudden disappearance of Sally and the complete dropping of her cancer storyline and the ongoing saga of Sunita wanting to be closer to the shop, I won’t even go there as I will take up this blog’s entire bandwidth!

Phew! I understand that my post seems to be a bit of a messy rant. I should get an English teacher to check my work. Although Mr Stape-wick will be too busy dodging loopholes…

Corrie crew get Special BAFTA Award

In December 2010, Coronation Street clocks up its 50th year. Along the way, the show has hired writers, directors and crew who have gone on to become some of the biggest names in television and film. And now, the British Academy Television Craft Awards on Sunday 23 May, recognises the behind-the-camera talent nurtured by the much-loved ITV soap.

You can read more on the award and see behind-the-scenes pictures at the BAFTA website.

Denise Welch's autobiography reveals a cocaine habit

Seems there's another Coronation Street celeb autobiography out on the shelves this month in addition to Bevery Callard's. This one is by Denise Welch who played Natalie Horrocks Barnes in the 1990s. She's the one, if you recall, that broke up Kevin and Sally's marraige. Turns out the big scandal revealed in her book is her confession that she had a cocaine habit while she was on Corrie. In the Mirror there are excerpts from her book. She admits she was suffering depression and that was how she coped (badly) with it. She also had a drink problem and an affair with a younger man while still married to Tim Healy. Sounds like she'd really been through a bad patch but is finally on the road to recovery. The risks she took and descriptions of how she struggled make for pretty harrowing reading. Her book, Pulling Myself Together, is out April 29 and you can also order it online.