The women of the street are not happy.
1) Kelly is mourning her mum by talking about Laura's Katy Perry-esque hair ("precious memories" according to Crimper Of The Cobbles, Maria). Shuttleworth's now seems to be the corporation funeral parlour as the morgue has released Rick and Laura's bodies into their care and George wants to know what the funeral arrangements should be. I'm reasonably sure you have to choose a funeral home, non? Anyhoo, Kelly stands to inherit £380K, which doesn't sound that much for an illicit fortune - Rick must have been a really crap gangster. Kelly is so upset that she goes to Seb's memorial garden and thinks about necking some (of her mum's) morphine until Abi talks her out of it, although this might end up being Chekov's morphine since Abi, upset by Leanne's high horse behaviour, contemplates taking it.
2) Toyah. The world's most silent child (no wonder everyone's so keen on her), Elsie, is going back to social services (it sounds like they keep the children in a cupboard next to the stationery) and Toyah is miserable about it. She has few drinks in the Bistro and storms around to the solicitors only to find out that Imran has gone to the hospital to see Alfie. She drinks more, tries to snog Adam and chews out Imran, who still thinks they can get back together.
3) Mrs Crawshaw, whose husband has dumped her, which leads to Daniel offering to do the school trip to Scotland and Naughty Nicki to help organise it.
Psst, Mrs C, I hear that Dev is available....
The only happy person is Sam who has a chess date with the world's second tallest 10 year old (the first is Jack), Jalena, in the cafe. Anyone else find this storyline a bit icky? I'm not saying that children can't have crushes on people (I myself was very much in love with Shakin' Stevens when I was 8) but Sam's not even a teenager yet: those hormones won't have kicked in yet. He asks his dad for advice, which Nick gives, sort of. As long as he doesn't tell Sam how to force any future wife into having an abortion.
And finally, Sarah says that Underworld hasn't been shifting enough lingerie during a cost of living crisis, and whoever out of Michael, Faye and Toyah gets the most sales will receive a small bonus. Well good luck getting Toyah to do anything, even for ready money. Although it turns out that Kirk might get the moolah as he accidentally arranges a meeting with Henderson's, who are big in knickers in the north west. I suppose this is the comedy storyline.
Also in further bad news, Adam's hair is reaching that badger stage again. I hear there's a very good barbers on Victoria Street...
Rachel Stevenson - on twitter
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Totally enjoyed reading this blog... Best I have seen... You made me laugh out loud, and caught me up to the latest cobbles news. I love it when the silly sides of Corrie is written about while recognizing the serious storylines. Thank you.
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