Alf and Alec began planning his political campaign. Their big idea was to emphasise Deirdre's personal failings by going on about her broken marriage. Classy. Audrey was concerned that the stress of the election would damage his health, so she booked him a doctor's appointment, where he was told he should probably lose a bit of weight. Any amusement that might have come out of this story was tempered with the knowledge that Bryan Mosley would suffer a heart attack in real life only a few months later. Ken Barlow grassed up Andy's book to the headmistress, and despite Andy's protestations about free market economies, he was forced to give all the money back. Tracy was the one getting it in the neck for having a dad who was such a killjoy. Des and Steph divided up the tasks and the kitchen, with him eventually cooking on the stove in the boat to avoid her. When Steph went out to fetch the tin opener she slipped off the ladder and broke her ankle. Des thought this would finally put the kibosh on her ski trip but he underestimated how stubborn she was and she packed her bags anyway. Jess was outstaying his welcome at the Duckworth's, eating Jack's dinner and refusing to chip in, but he kept his place in the home by telling Vera his family secret. His grandmother was a parlour maid who was made pregnant by... Edward VII. Yes, Vera Duckworth has blue blood.
TUESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 22nd and 25th March 1991
A sulking Andy decided he wasn't going back to school. Ken and Liz tried to talk him round to no avail, and when Jim told him to get a job, he announced he'd be leaving home. Deirdre added to the McDonald's woe by asking Liz to be her agent in the elections, putting Emily's nose out of joint, and then Jim's mum to take a turn for the worst so he had to rush back to Belfast. Des finally caved and apologised to Steph, expecting that to solve everything, but she got on the plane anyway. He continued to live in filth and even tried persuading Angie to clean it for him, the cheeky sod. Mike and Jackie got engaged and looked round a majestic country pile. Gail was looking for some purpose in her life, and offered to child-mind Rosie for Sally so she could go back to work. Martin reminded her that he'd promised to take care of the kids, and told her to go back to the cafe.
WEDNESDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 27th and 29th March 1991
It's quite eye-opening to watch Classic Corrie and learn that men in the early nineties were basically toddlers in size eight boots. Des continued to wallow in his own filth, desperately begging women in the pub to clean his house while wearing a crumpled shirt he simply couldn't work out how to iron, and I wondered how he managed to get out of bed in the morning without injuring himself. He finally persuaded Phyllis to help him out, which is great, because Des and Phyllis are adorable. Meanwhile the Street's womenfolk were horrified at the idea of Martin Platt looking after his own children, with Human Festering Boil Ivy particularly vocal about the disgusting state of affairs. Sally was more modern though and offered to pay Martin to take care of Rosie alongside the other kids. Liz and Jim headed off to Belfast, leaving the twins under the arm's length care of Deirdre. They immediately planned a party, which she nipped in the bud, while Andy decided to work in the bike shop answering the phones and keeping things ticking over. He'd abandoned his plans to leave home and wanted to prove how mature he was. Jackie persuaded Mike to sign a prenup, which he was fine with until he read it and discovered dozens of clauses that covered her back in case of a divorce. He became enraged and said that she was planning for the marriage to fail.
THURSDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 1st and 3rd April 1991
The Street continued to recoil from the revelation that Martin - a male man with a willy and everything - was looking after not only his own children, but Sally's as well. Oh, hang on: as Ivy said, Nicky and Sarah-Lou weren't even his kids, so he'd have absolutely no clue what to do with them. Sally went back to work and panicked about Rosie all day but it turned out he could cope. (I should say that Martin was absolutely wonderful throughout - a New Man before New Men existed - and it almost made me forgive all that business with Jill Halfpenny). Slightly less good in the New Man stakes was Kevin, who brought David home instead of Rosie by mistake because all babies look the same. It might have all been for naught anyway, because the landlord of the cafe had bumped the rent up from £225 to £900, and Alma reckoned they'd have to close up. Mike continued to sulk over the prenup so Jackie caved and served it to him for dinner, promising to "eat her words". Her solicitor pointed out how dumb this was so a new, less onerous contract was drawn up, giving Mike 25% in the event of a marriage breakdown. You'll never guess - Baldwin was perfectly fine with this one. Jack had a great idea for an April Fool. He sent his wife a card from "the Queen" (actually Angie using her best calligraphy) saying she was pleased to hear Vera had discovered her true heritage and welcoming her to the family. Vera was on cloud nine, crafting a shrine to the Royal Family on the back wall, and when Jack told her the truth she refused to believe it. He dragged Angie round to confess the truth but she wound Jack up and pretended she knew nothing about it.
FRIDAY - Episodes originally broadcast 5th and 8th April 1991
Joss Shackleton was sniffing around the elderly ladies of the Street, dropping hints at Phyllis and then trying to get Emily Bishop to measure his inside leg. She consented to a tango with him in the charity shop which infuriated Percy. He wrenched Joss away and pushed him over, sending him to hospital and needing a blood transfusion. I'm sure we can all see where this is going. Steph returned from holiday to a gleaming house, which got her suspicious that Des had got a woman over; he admitted, yes, he had, and her name was Phyllis Pearce. He was interested in a message in Italian on her plaster from a ski instructor called "Aldo" that looked a little bit saucy. Alma was despondent about the rent increase and decided to throw in the towel. Gail fought their corner, going to the estate agent and trying to negotiate, but she hit a brick wall. She was lucky enough to run into Baldwin in the Street and confessed all to him. Mike said he'd see what he could do, and sorted out a meeting for Gail and the owner, on the condition that she didn't tell Alma anything. She also didn't tell Martin, which caused a problem when he heard Mike's voice on the phone.
@merseytart still hates the charity shop.
Classic Corrie is taking a break over the festive season, but returns to ITV3 in the New Year.
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Bryan Mosley died 8 years later not a few months.
ReplyDeleteBryan recovered from the heart attack in 1991 and returned to the show. He died in 1999.
DeleteGreat reviews but these episodes were pretty dull weren't they? Steph was a great character but only lasted a year or so, whereas Des was dull as ditch water and went on and on for years!
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to the new year!
Scott I'll think you'll find people were using the term new man back in 1991.
ReplyDelete