Coronation Street double episode review, Monday 17 February

Peter returns from Paris, just avoiding being spotted by Maria and Ozzie, with the sole intent of spending the day with the birthday girl, Tina, who is delighted by his arrival, and keeps the poor postman waiting. ‘Everyone thinks I’m in Paris,’ he tells Tina, calling himself an ‘International Man of Mystery - I come, I go, nobody sees me.’  He even tells Carla on the phone that he’s going to spend the time until his flight having a croissant and a stroll, in the most convincing tones. The bangle that Peter gave to Tina caused him a little anxiety, as Tina said she had seen Carla wearing it. Peter fell for the trick and looked mightily relieved when Tina told him she was winding him up.   

Michelle does something nice! I know - ridiculous! She actually, after a bit of argy-bargy, allows Tina the day off for her birthday. If only she knew the true reason and not the false one - a late arrangement by friends to celebrate her birthday.

Steve sees the lights on in Carla and Peter’s flat and Michelle, who is the keeper of a key, asks Steve to go over to check that everything is alright. Steve, terrified to go alone, eventually persuades Lloyd to accompany him and there is Tina, half clad. A convincing (ish) excuse by Tina is dreamed up and believed. ‘Peter asked if I could mind the place while he was away,’ explains Tina. Lloyd asks an obvious question, ‘Any reason for doing that naked?’ Quick-thinking Tina says her shower is on the blink. And off they go and it is all a bit of a laugh…  

From one affair to another, at least it’s an affair in Rita’s head, between Gloria and Dennis. Into the Kabin come Emily and Mary and Mary takes it upon herself to create one of the strangest analogies of all time. She likens Dennis and Rita to Take That; to Robbie Williams and Gary  Barlow respectively. As Robbie goes gallivanting around, Gary is left feeling let down, but then they come back together. In a bid to reconcile Rita and Dennis, Mary asks Rita if she ‘really wants to endure years of weight problems and loneliness before the highly lucrative come-back tour.’ The ‘different’ Rita of recent episodes tells Mary, ‘I just want you to shut up and stop blathering on.’ The Rita of her previous incarnation would not have said this; she would have been kinder, more polite. Rita speaking in this way is a lesser woman and such indignity and rudeness is beneath her.  

The man himself arrives, Dennis, who calls himself ‘the proverbial bad penny’ and adds, ‘Can I come home?’ Rita certainly doesn’t welcome him with open arms and says, ‘I don’t know what I want.’ Having stayed on Gloria’s sofa,  Stella reminds her mother that Dennis is a married man. Devoid of any moral responsibility, Gloria just tells her daughter that Dennis ‘is bored with Rita.’ It’s hard to judge; maybe he feels excitement and gets a bite of old times with Gloria, but he is safe and secure with Rita, older by ten years as Dennis has reminded her of late! Gloria tells Dennis that she does not think that he and Rita were ever suited.  

The scenes in the Bistro with Dennis, Ritchie and Gloria were excellently executed and an example of how empty of loyalty the road to success may be. So Ritchie is off, touring with the bad tempered Chris who has calmed down since his pacemaker has been fitted, though this seems to be making a virtue of a necessity. Gloria had texted Ritchie to hotfoot it to the Bistro, to try to sort Dennis out, though clearly she doesn’t want Dennis to know that, ‘What does it matter what I said?’ says Gloria.  Anyway, Dennis and Gloria have been left in the lurch, despite the oral contract they claim they have. ‘So you’re trading us in for a bad-tempered ex-pat with a pacemaker? Time we let this dream go, Gloria.’  Rita, the victor, tells Gloria, ‘I don’t need to pretend I’m a teenager just to feel good about myself.’ Gloria informs Rita that, ’We don’t serve Horlicks.’  Dennis and Rita seem to be fully back on and Gloria asks for the sick-bucket. Rita wins the next point by asking for the champagne list.

What a great young actor Tracy’s daughter is becoming.  Interesting to see that Amy shuns technology in preference for going to a museum.  She played her parents off brilliantly by manipulating them both with parental guilt. So  Steve and Tracy are taking Amy to the Museum of Science and Industry – MUSI-  for the activity day where Amy’s friends, Lita Wilson and Bella Roberts will be joined by Amy Macdonald-Barlow and let’s hope a good time is had by all. Tracy will be going dressed as a Victorian maid but can only get a size 24 , her plan to go as a lady thwarted. ‘You’ll have to take it in for me,’ orders Tracy, but Deirdre can’t do that as it’s a hired costume, so can only pin it, but we must all be pleased that one of the pins stuck into Tracy.

A poignant moment was when Fiz opened up the parcel against general consent to find an addition to Roy’s model railway, that Hayley had ordered for him before her death. In addition, seeing Roy’s bag brought into the café was a shock , since we all know that Roy and his bag are inseparable and the bag was found in the canal. Credit to Fiz for taking the photos of Roy out and about in the hope of discovering Roy’s whereabouts.

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