Monday, 26 January 2009

Coronation Street Weekly Update, January 26 2009

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Greetings fellow Corrie fans and fanettes and welcome to another of me weekly wotsits full of comments from the cobbles. Settle back with a cuppa and a nice slice of cake and without any further ado, here we go with this week’s Coronation Street update.

Maria’s in her jim-jams and out of her mind when she heads to the Rovers to accuse Tony Gordon of killing both Liam and Jed. The thing is, as we all know, Maria’s not mad, she absolutely right except that Jed’s not dead but she doesn’t know that. I do, ‘cos I’ve seen pictures of him in the papers. Anyway, Maria’s not right in t’head and after the cops don’t believe her story about Tony killing Jed (maybe they’ve seen pictures in the papers too) Maria turns up the volume on the CD in the car – it’s The Stone Roses singing ‘I am The Resurrection’ – and runs down Tony Gordon before crashing into Underworld. She’s fine, the baby’s fine, Tony’s fine, but the cops come sniffing again and warn Maria that she could face the charge of attempted murder if she’s not careful.

Corrie turned glam this week when Hollywood actress Stephanie Beacham swapped the Colbys for the cobbles. She turned up as Martha who lives on a barge and is set to get together with Ken who floats her boat. Ken meets her when he takes a walk along the canal and Martha saves Eccles who falls into the icy canal after chasing a duck. Ken’s flirt alert picks up Martha on his randy radar and warms to her wooing with some homemade leek and potato soup. When she asks about his family and he tells her his son’s mother is dead, she assumes he’s a widower and Ken does nowt to put her right. Martha’s a book reading, radio listening, Shiraz drinking, barge floating lady. And Deirdre as we all know, is not. Never fear, Deirdre's got just the thing to warm Ken up when he comes in from his cold canal walk, it's leek and potato soup but this time, from a tin. Would've guessed Corrie would see soup as metaphor for marital strife? Life in the Barlow house is going to be rocky for a while. Again.

Over at the builder’s yard, fingers point at Joe for nicking the copper pipes as everyone knows he’s skint with no cash after Joe's Klever Kitchens Koincided with the Kredit Krunch. David knows it were the Windass clan who nicked the pipes and reports them to the police, for all the good it’ll do. Eddie Windass then pretends he’s been mugged and all the lads' darts subs have been nicked from his pocket. What he’s really done is knocked himself in the face with the living room door and pocketed the cash. He’s a wrong ‘un, that Windass.

Chesney decides to cheer up Fiz and fixes her up with Graeme. Bless him, he writes a poem to her, an ode to her flaming hair. It goes: “Your flaming hair, your flaming hair…” Well, you get the idea but it doesn’t do the trick as Fiz is still mooning over John who’s in jail. Graeme admits to Fiz that his first love was Aqua Marina from Stingray. Me too, and I’m a girl.

There’s chaos in the Webster house when both Rosie and Sophie manage to upset Kev and Sally this week. First off, Kev chokes on his corn flakes when he opens the paper at breakfast to see a double page spread of Rosie with her cleavage centre-fold. She’s sold her soul to the papers after being locked up by John Stape. And as if one little trollop wasn’t enough, Sophie then admits that she’s pregnant. Only she’s not, it’s all a cry for help from a desperate Sophie who’s starved of affection when her parents pass her over for her older sister. Kev tells Sophie she can speak to him about boys or about anything she likes, as he plays with an Airfix Model at the dining room table. I only hope he’s thought on to put a cloth underneath otherwise Sally will give him what for.


Norris puzzles over the issues of the day when he tries to come up with a slogan to sell Oldham. A lightbulb pings over his head, he’s got it, so he has. “Oldham!” he cries “Home of the tubular bandage!” I think he could be onto something there.

And over in the Rovers, Eileen discovers that Julie Carp’s mum Paula is one of her old school mates but for some strange reason Julie’s being cagey about what her mum’s up to or indeed, where she is.

And that’s just about that for this week.

Coronation Street writers this week were David Bowker, Julie Jones, Mark Burt and Chris Fewtrell.

Glenda
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