Greetings and welcome to another weekly update. This time the update covers two weeks as Corrie was cancelled for a few days and then was all over the schedules. And so, without any further ado, here we go with this week’s Coronation Street update.
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There’s been two major stories over the last couple of weeks, Catalogue Tony vs The Flames of Hell (aka The Underworld siege) and Gail vs Jail. Let’s crack on first with the Underworld siege - you may need a cushion to hide behind.
So, Tony Gordon breaks out of jail with the help of cell-mate Robbie who’s just been released. Tony storms back to the Street with his beady eye, a murdering mind and a gun to Carla Connor’s pretty head. He tapes Carla’s gob shut and ties her to her executive swivel chair. And then he did the same to Hayley, on the cheaper chair, and with the two women taped up and tied down, terrible Tony threw petrol around after shooting Robbie dead to the factory floor. By ‘eck this were good.
Hayley wiggled free and Tony threw her out on to the cobbles as the cops buzzed outside and a crowd gathered to find out what was going on. Mind you, it wasn’t a very big crowd and you’d expect a big crowd if there was an armed siege going on at the end of your street. I know I’d be out for a look. Carla wiggles herself free too, and makes a run for the door as Tony sets fire to the petrol and Underworld goes up in flames. Carla runs out and Tony runs after her then he turns and walks back into the inferno and another Corrie villain went and gone and died. It was all quite exciting and Kirk got het up about his packet of Wagon Wheels which were in his locker and might just have melted.
Now that Underworld’s dead and buried along with Tony Gordon, Janice and the girls get a gob on as they’ve not got any work. Carla’s gone to South Africa for the football with Trevor (although if I had Trevor to myself I wouldn’t be watching football) and while she’s away, with Leanne’s help, Nick starts up Underworld again in Peter Barlow’s empty wine bar. Leanne contacts George (boo, hiss, etc) and now Peter and Leanne are at odds as Peter reckons Leanne’s helped out Nick ‘cos she still fancies her ex-husband. “That boy’s face is crying out for a slap,” says Peter of Nick. I can only agree.
Over at the other end of town away from the fires and the deaths, Gail Platt was in court. Even David gave evidence, promising to tell “the troof, the whole troof and nothing but the troof” but the Polish polisher from the lakeside cottage didn’t show up despite being bribed. Huh, some people, eh? Anyway, the jury decided Gail was guilty of many things: bad hair, whispering and all twelve are unanimous that she should have been shot for bringing David Platt into the world, but as for killing Joe McIntyre, they voted her free.
Gail skipped home for a cuppa and a fight with Deirdre on the cobbles when Deirdre admitted she knew Tracy was lying and she’d stitched Gail right up. You’d think Gail would be smiling now she’s released and at home but she’s shooting evils at Natasha every time the woman who’s dating her golden boy Nick comes into her peripheral vision. Natasha was once fun, a bit daft, but since she got together with Nick, she’s become needy and dull. Such is life for anyone involved with a Plattisley boy.
Elsewhere on the Street, Roy proposed to Hayley, upstairs in the flat. And the lady with the flat shoes and sensible hair, she say ‘yes’ and about time too! She breaks the news to the girls over cakes in Roy’s Rolls. “We’re getting married!” to which everyone replies: “We thought you already were?” Well, no, they never were, not properly and legally but now with a change in the law for transsexuals which happened a few years ago, they can now be legally wed. “Do they sell a card in The Kabin for that?” asks Deirdre to Ken.
Mary hands Hayley her marriage portfolio, the dossier she’s been working on for, like, ever, which contains details of everything from dresses and tiaras to garters and cakes. Mary’s clearly been working on her own wedding for some time, hoping for something old (Norris), something new (the Motorhome), something borrowed (Tina’s job at the Kabin) and something blue (Rita’s exotic dancing past).
And finally for this update, Audrey’s getting jealous of Lewis’ work as an escort when he sleeps over with a lady friend before giving Audrey a booty call. I know, at her age too. Anyway, she’s not best pleased so Lewis says he’s giving up the escort work but he’s now got a sparkle in his eye every time he spies Deirdre on the street.
And that’s just about that for the last two weeks.
Coronation Street writers for the last two weeks were Mark Wadlow, Stephen Russell, Chris Fewtrell, Joe Turner, Jan McVerry, Jayne Hollinson, John Kerr, Debbie Oates, Julie Jones and Damon Rochefort.
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