Welcome and here we go with another week’s worth of words from Weatherfield. Or to put it another way, another load of old cobblers from the cobbles. And so, without any further ado, here we go with this week’s Coronation Street update.
You know when you’ve got the house to yourself and you’re treating yourself to a bubbly soak in the tub? Don’t you just hate it when a fella comes crashing through your living room window and you have to stand there with Matey bubbles covering your embarrassment. I know, it happens all the time round our way. “I’m Jake by the way,” (which I thought was a bit of an odd surname) says the fella to Michelle when she gets out of her bath to let him in through the window. Jake by the way has been sent by Dev to fix her leaky roof and when he spots Ms Connor in the altogether he lunges in for a kiss on her fireside rug. She throws him out, half-heartedly, and calls the police to report him for harassment. That’s before she goes to dinner with him and later shows him the stitching on her duvet of course. And then he tells her he’s off to Glasgow but just like thrush and cold sores, he’ll be back. When Dev refuses to pay Jake’s bill for fixing the roof, Jake gently threatens Dev in his soft-spoken way. I wondered what kind of threats a weird but gentle soul like Jake would exact on Dev – come round and lick his shop carrots when no-one was looking? But no, Jake means business and he rips off half the tiles from Michelle’s roof before scarpering to Scotland, leaving a bemused Michelle home alone. Well, she’s not exactly alone, she’s got Ben staying with her and Ryan while Ben’s folks are on their hols. Ben’s got the hots for Michelle, you can tell by the way he fiddles with his Xbox.
Over in the Kabin, Norris sacks silent Joan and there’s a lovely scene when he takes a phone call from Rita who’s still on her cruise. He pulls up a chair in the Kabin and gets down to a right good gossip with her. She’s been invited to sit at the captain’s table, no less, although she’s a little disappointed that he looks like Ronnie Corbett. She’s much missed, not only by Norris but by this Corrie fan.
Aunty Pam stuck her nose into something nasty this week when she tackled both Molly and Kevin about their affair. Kevin comes up with a plan to lie to Aunty Pam that the affair’s ended but will their secret remain safe for much longer? Oh, do you know what? I don’t care. I just want it finished, I really do.
At Underworld, Tony collapses with a heart attack outside of the factory. Hang on, haven’t we been here before with Mike Baldwin who collapsed and died on the factory steps? They should put up a sign or something. Anyway, Roy’s passing by with his bag in his hand and is the one responsible for getting Tony to hospital. Thinking he’s at death’s door, Tony confides in Roy that he was the one who killed the bats. This doesn’t strike Roy as such a surprise but when Tony then says he also killed Liam, Roy comes over all peculiar and has to sit down. Maria flies back from Cyprus and Tony recovers, but not before Roy tells Hayley about Tony’s words. Now that he’s not dead, Tony knows he has to cover his tracks about his confession to Roy and offers him £5,000 to donate to a charity of his choice. “A gentlemanly agreement,” he says, offering his hand to Roy. But Tony’s no gentleman, and Roy, a gentle man, knows it’s hush money.
Peter Barlow got a surprise visitor this week when Simon’s other granddad turned up. He’s George, dad of Lucy the florist who died, and Peter takes some persuading that George should be allowed into Simon’s life. Unfortunately, little Simon got a bit of bashing when he stood behind the door of the flat and was banged in the face when Peter threw the door open. So it was a bloodied Simon who George first meets and he assumes Peter’s been bashing the kid up. Peter reminds Simon that he’s already got granddad Ken, the one who takes him to school, reads him stories and throws in a bit of wishy-washy liberal idealism with his CocoPops.
Jesse and Julie meet at four for frolics and fun and Eileen’s suspicious when she spies them together. She assumes there’s summat funny going on between her sister and her fella but the two of them are just playing Cowboys and Indians. But from the look on their faces when Jesse brings Julie back to the Street afterwards, it looks like frolics and fun might turn into snogs and some more. Jesse’s such a wimp anyway, he doesn’t deserve Eileen and I wish the writers would put a proper smile on her face.
And finally, there was good news for Claire Peacock as Ashley finally had the snip.
And that’s just about that for this week.
Coronation Street writers this week were Daran Little, John Kerr, Joe Turner and Carmel Morgan.
Find out more about the Coronation Street writing team.
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